TheColdMrX
Unverified
- Joined
- Jan 28, 2021
- Messages
- 2
Hello forum, first I'd like to thank you for taking your time to read and consider my post.
So here is some backstory and forgive me if it gets a bit lengthy. Well, when I was 17 years old I enlisted in the Army Reserves as a 91B Light-wheel Mechanic. Although the MOS that I had gone to MEPS expecting to get was as a 19D Cavalry Scout. My whole life I wanted to be a "commando", "G.I Joe", and I say that with a slight regret because I feel as if I may have ruined my chance of being who I wanted to be.
Now I don't want this post to sound like I'm feeling sorry for myself.. because I don't, definitely not anymore. But I was raised by just my mom after I found my father overdosed when I was 6. And at the foot of his grave he has a grave marker stamped with 2 sets of service dates from two branches US ARMY & US AIRFORCE. I should add I didn't really know him because he was in prison from when I was born till when I was three years old.
But, thinking about it I think i created my own fantasy of the type of person I thought he was.. idk man.
Anyways.. 12 years old comes along and my mother gets a non malignant tumor on her brain stem, undergoes surgery, has six strokes, and what seems like an entire brain reset.. but because she's a god damn warrior she is able to survive. 16 Years old comes, I don't know what I'm going to do with my life; we don't have money for college, and I always had admiration for service. Then I see a recruiter in my highschool I tell me who I am, what I want to do, and where I want to go. He gives me the good sweet cool aid and I drank it all up and asked for more. After doing alot of my own research I was sure on the branch and the MOS. (Army, 19D) as I said already..
Here's the part I would like to bring to attention that I had repeated 7th grade, so I was older then most of my classmates.. meaning I was 17 as a Junior and not a Sr.
But because I was so motivated and dead set on becoming a soldier. I allowed myself to be talked into the "Split Option" program... which at the time sounded awesome.
So I enlist, I go to BCT at Ft Knox, KY. I graduate.
I come back to my hometown, graduate from highschool, and then go to AIT where I also then graduate at Ft Jackson. After AIT, I come back home decide I'm trying to stay far away from "Home" as possible haha. So I packed a few totes and took my shit and moved a few states away.. transfered my reserve unit as well and things were going good.
But here's where things became turbulent.. my mother informs me that the mesh in her head is coming undone and she's going to have to go under the knife again. And that its gonna me very very soon.. so me in the middle of starting a life I'm actually proud of decides to put all that on hold and come back home to what I thought was to "Take care of my mom" but I don't really know what I was doing tbh..
So after coming back and and returning to my original and quite lackluster unit (its deactivated today). I simply just lost my discipline.. and the consequences of that trickled down into many aspects of my life. Physical, Mental, Financial, Emotional just felt like I was getting ripped apart in different directions.. I started smoking which I had never done in my life then followed up with binge drinking (not even 21).
We all know how that recipe comes out.. long story short now I had stopped going to drills, I stopped eating right, I stopped everything, even had a "Heartbreak" smh.
Eventually.. they just kick me out.. administrative discharge oth. Never had any disciplinary problems AR15's nor corrective counslings.. fast forward what feels like countless years reality started coming back to me.. I'm 28 today since my earlier 20's I've worked various production, manufacturing, sales, and service jobs. I have to say "task variety" is something I enjoy very much.
I started doing unarmed security gigs and to be honest I quite enjoyed it.. however the lack of responsibility, meaning, and money lol just keeps me starving to be better, and to do better.
So here's the deal, and how I'm going to end this post.
I got a message from a recruiter about doing armed security in Afghan, it is a reputable company and to be honest I would love to do it. It's not the military but it is living at the tier of life I know I should be at, i'm hoping someone reads this and just gives me their truth. Cold or Warm don't matter to me.. tell me how it is.
So here is some backstory and forgive me if it gets a bit lengthy. Well, when I was 17 years old I enlisted in the Army Reserves as a 91B Light-wheel Mechanic. Although the MOS that I had gone to MEPS expecting to get was as a 19D Cavalry Scout. My whole life I wanted to be a "commando", "G.I Joe", and I say that with a slight regret because I feel as if I may have ruined my chance of being who I wanted to be.
Now I don't want this post to sound like I'm feeling sorry for myself.. because I don't, definitely not anymore. But I was raised by just my mom after I found my father overdosed when I was 6. And at the foot of his grave he has a grave marker stamped with 2 sets of service dates from two branches US ARMY & US AIRFORCE. I should add I didn't really know him because he was in prison from when I was born till when I was three years old.
But, thinking about it I think i created my own fantasy of the type of person I thought he was.. idk man.
Anyways.. 12 years old comes along and my mother gets a non malignant tumor on her brain stem, undergoes surgery, has six strokes, and what seems like an entire brain reset.. but because she's a god damn warrior she is able to survive. 16 Years old comes, I don't know what I'm going to do with my life; we don't have money for college, and I always had admiration for service. Then I see a recruiter in my highschool I tell me who I am, what I want to do, and where I want to go. He gives me the good sweet cool aid and I drank it all up and asked for more. After doing alot of my own research I was sure on the branch and the MOS. (Army, 19D) as I said already..
Here's the part I would like to bring to attention that I had repeated 7th grade, so I was older then most of my classmates.. meaning I was 17 as a Junior and not a Sr.
But because I was so motivated and dead set on becoming a soldier. I allowed myself to be talked into the "Split Option" program... which at the time sounded awesome.
So I enlist, I go to BCT at Ft Knox, KY. I graduate.
I come back to my hometown, graduate from highschool, and then go to AIT where I also then graduate at Ft Jackson. After AIT, I come back home decide I'm trying to stay far away from "Home" as possible haha. So I packed a few totes and took my shit and moved a few states away.. transfered my reserve unit as well and things were going good.
But here's where things became turbulent.. my mother informs me that the mesh in her head is coming undone and she's going to have to go under the knife again. And that its gonna me very very soon.. so me in the middle of starting a life I'm actually proud of decides to put all that on hold and come back home to what I thought was to "Take care of my mom" but I don't really know what I was doing tbh..
So after coming back and and returning to my original and quite lackluster unit (its deactivated today). I simply just lost my discipline.. and the consequences of that trickled down into many aspects of my life. Physical, Mental, Financial, Emotional just felt like I was getting ripped apart in different directions.. I started smoking which I had never done in my life then followed up with binge drinking (not even 21).
We all know how that recipe comes out.. long story short now I had stopped going to drills, I stopped eating right, I stopped everything, even had a "Heartbreak" smh.
Eventually.. they just kick me out.. administrative discharge oth. Never had any disciplinary problems AR15's nor corrective counslings.. fast forward what feels like countless years reality started coming back to me.. I'm 28 today since my earlier 20's I've worked various production, manufacturing, sales, and service jobs. I have to say "task variety" is something I enjoy very much.
I started doing unarmed security gigs and to be honest I quite enjoyed it.. however the lack of responsibility, meaning, and money lol just keeps me starving to be better, and to do better.
So here's the deal, and how I'm going to end this post.
I got a message from a recruiter about doing armed security in Afghan, it is a reputable company and to be honest I would love to do it. It's not the military but it is living at the tier of life I know I should be at, i'm hoping someone reads this and just gives me their truth. Cold or Warm don't matter to me.. tell me how it is.
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