# "Thank You For Your Service:"  Yes, Or No?



## Marauder06 (Oct 17, 2018)

Curious to hear thoughts on this subject, from military or non-military.  Main gist is below, you can read the whole article here if you want:




> "Even if our job in the service is less than optimal, we are still better people for having experienced it, and appreciate a part of life 99% of the population will never know.
> 
> None of that sounds like something we should be thanked for.
> 
> If you feel the need to thank anyone, thank our families, thank our loved ones, thank the ones that truly sacrificed, and the loved ones that continue to sacrifice."


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## amlove21 (Oct 17, 2018)

I have evolved on this one throughout the years. A while ago somewhere here on the board, we had a conversation about wearing military/team/unit T shirts out in public before that sort of shaped my perspective on it a bit.

I used to feel like it was a bit attention seeking behavior and unnecessary, but I have found in recent memory that wearing shirts (especially memorial workout shirts of the like) leads to conversations about important topics like brothers lost or charities that are worth supporting.

It used to weird me out a bit and I would mumble something after a "thanks for what you do/your service"; now I just say "hey, thank you, I love doing it."

In the end it might be a little touchy-feely, but that person saying it is coming from a place of gratitude and thankfulness and the only reason I felt weird was because it's just part of who I am as a person, that's why I am in the military. They don't know that, and they really are thankful for me being who I am.


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## Cookie_ (Oct 17, 2018)

This right here pretty much sums up my feelings on the matter. 




> Want to thank us for our service? Stop saying it the way you say, “bless you” and “how are you”.  While we are sure your intent is good, and you mean it, it starts to become an empty saying that at best makes us uncomfortable and at worst seems insincere.  Thank us with your behavior.  Thank us with your patriotism.  Thank us with your love of all American Citizens even the ones you disagree with on an issue.


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## Topkick (Oct 17, 2018)

Its okay. I appreciate it when people thank me for serving. I certainly don't expect it, but I appreciate it. I see it more of a sign that people appreciate their military and country, not me as an individual. 

I myself ALWAYS run down the old dudes with black hats to thank them for their service in WWII, Korea, Vietnam, etc. and usually get to hear a great story.

Just the other day I was wearing a hoodie from an old unit, and an anonymous couple paid for my breakfast. Greatly appreciated.


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## Devildoc (Oct 17, 2018)

@amlove21 , that is a great response, and I will steal it.  I get embarrassed when people thank me.  I don't like the attention (for instance, my wife is planning my 50th bday party next month, I told her I just want her and the kids.  I don't like the attention).

If my wife sees anyone in a 'vet' ball cap--you all know the type--she will stop and thank them.  I have been amazed at the responses.  Some men just nod or smile, some say 'thanks' back, a couple WWII-era vets cried.


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## Grunt (Oct 17, 2018)

I believe that a great deal of those that give thanks to Veterans are sincere, and because of that...I welcome them and then drive on.

I was recently thanked in a restaurant. A man that I had never met took the time to get out of his booth with his wife and children to simply walk up to me and thank me for my service. I have no reason to believe he was anything but sincere. There are still grateful people among us.


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## DozerB (Oct 17, 2018)

Might be an unpopular opinion but it just makes me feel awkward. I'd be the first to thank a WWII or Vietnam vet or GWOT-era combat vet. Even a lot of non-combat vets served admirably and sacrificially throughout the war on terror.

However, for most of us younger guys who have gained far more from the military life than we have ever given (sure we have to move a lot and wake up early and sleep outside in the rain, but some of us enjoy those things and would probably do them anyway regardless of job), I would much rather people thank an EMT or a cop or a firefighter. Honestly, my 2-week old stopped breathing last week and the EMTs were there within 7 minutes to give him oxygen. Your average paramedic and school teacher have done far more to serve this country than I have, and yet I also receive tax-free housing, groceries, innumerable benefits, and almost free healthcare for me and my family, oh yeah, and I also go home at noon on most Fridays.

I'm not even saying there's a way to quantify how we label those who have served enough to be thanked, but I certainly don't personally feel like I've sacrificed anything that your average first responder hasn't, so when people say it it just makes me feel odd. But that doesn't mean I don't think there are veterans in this country that absolutely deserve our gratitude. It just ain't me.


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## DC (Oct 17, 2018)

I for one dont wear too much mil stuff to advert my experience. Once in awhile I wear a hat or blue and gold. Folks say thanks and I say thanks for your support for the best time ever. I kinda have a soft spot for the WW2/Korea/Vietnam crew. I go out of my way to shake a mitt and see eyes light up. Especially warms me to see it.


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## Devildoc (Oct 17, 2018)

@DozerB , while I kinda agree with you re: emergency services (EMS, FF, LEOs) and they do deserve more support, that doesn't mean you haven't sacrificed:  just signing on the dotted line put you into a very rare minority, whether you've been downrange or not.  Emergency services, teachers, they are not expected to go to bad places and do bad things with a reasonable probability of being injured.  Just a different perspective.  Now, from my vantage it doesn't mean you/we are 'less than' or 'better than', at all.

@DC , I love talking to WWII vets.  In the front of my hospital last year, last spring after a cold snap, I saw an old man wearing a WWII veteran cap.  I went up to chat, turned out he was a Pearl Harbor vet.  Living history, and they are almost all gone.


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## medicchick (Oct 17, 2018)

Devildoc said:


> @DC , I love talking to WWII vets.  In the front of my hospital last year, last spring after a cold snap, I saw an old man wearing a WWII veteran cap.  I went up to chat, turned out he was a Pearl Harbor vet.  Living history, and they are almost all gone.



When we lived in Alaska I worked at a local grocery store. It one point in my line I had a Diamond, Old Scroll, and current era Ranger (WWII vet had his hat on the others shirts).  The older two made fun of the "young whippersnapper".  They just laughed when I muttered "3rd Batt best Batt."  I saw the WWII and modern era Ranger having lunch together later in the week.


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## BlackSmokeRisinG (Oct 17, 2018)

It always felt a little weird because I think the Army made me feel like a nobody unless I was with my boys, then I was a BAMF ready to kill/die. 

I appreciate the company of other combat vets. I don't feel like I fit in to broader society so much anymore but I always remember the care packages, the women who were so nice, the older vets who treated me with respect.

*You're welcome.*


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## SpitfireV (Oct 17, 2018)

People would think you're weird if you do it here. I've had people thank "you for being on the border and protecting us" and it's fucking strange. Yeah I have to look at some awful stuff and deal with shitheads but that's what I'm paid to do. Noone does anything for free. 

If I see an old fella with an RSA or military lapel badge I'll often ask where they served and I've had some interesting conversations. But if you started thanking them everyone involved would get weirded out. That's our culture though.


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## arch_angel (Oct 17, 2018)

If you wanna thank me for my service give me more free food at Applebee's!

Joking aside, one thing that I've resorted to when people offer a thank you is a simple "thank you for your support".


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## Kraut783 (Oct 17, 2018)

I'm okay with it....but like others have said, I hardly ever wear clothing that has military stuff on it...low profile with an obscure flash/badge when I do...so I'm not usually the recipient.

But, like others have said....I do like hitting up the WWII/Korea vets.

My step-father is a retired Marine Mustang, flew CAS in F4U Corsairs in Korea, then F-4 Phatoms in Viet-nam...he turns 90 this year and still only tells the funny or interesting non-combat stories...but after my first deployment, we became much closer.


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## Stretcher Jockey (Oct 17, 2018)

Just to echo what a lot of people have said, I try not to give away my military affiliation with clothing. Because of that Im rarely thanked for my service, but thats ok with me because a lot of the time I feel like I havent done enough to deserve it. I actually had an experience recently where I was on duty and dropped a patient off at the local civillian hospital when a mother and daughter who were walking out caught me and thanked me. My first thought was "Oh did I run on you as a patient?" And they said no, for being in the military. I guess it kinda goes to show that Im more proud of the change Ive done while in EMS than what I have done as a military member. Im proud of being in the military absolutely, but seeing tangible change in patients make it seem a lot more meaningful.

I think @amlove21 brings up an excellent point about clothing leading to a discussion. I proudly wear a POW/MIA shirt I got while helping organize an event and that has lead to some amazing conversations with people. I guess I have never really looked at it like a beacon to start the talk.


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## wp18 (Oct 17, 2018)

My dad always said don't thank me for doing my job


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## Topkick (Oct 17, 2018)

Kraut783 said:


> I hardly ever wear clothing that has military stuff on it



I wear accumulated sweatshirts on the weekends, or to the gym and some have my old unit insignias or US Army printed somewhere on them. Some may say its tacky or whatever, but I don't care. I am proud to have served in the units I did, with the men I did, and I don't mind wearing the swag from time to time. Like when I wear sports team swag, I've had the same experience @amlove21. Many vets have initiated conversation because we have something in common. Occasionally, someone will thank me for my service and that's ok. I think you all deserve to be recognized for your service and it also makes the Civies feel better about themselves.


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## DasBoot (Oct 17, 2018)

I hate it when anyone says anything. I feel like it’s usually insincere, and if it’s sincere it comes more from a misplaced sense of awe. I’m a dude doing a job- I’m happy to talk about it. Just talk to me about my job like you talk about yours at Best Buy or a law office.


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## Kakashi66223 (Oct 18, 2018)

@DasBoot. Believe me there are people out there that are not superficial. 

Especially if they approach you and say thank you. Because they are not obligated to talk to you. They say what they mean, or they are not saying it-- at all.

I don't want to rant because I figured there must be an inside joke, so I digress. 

So yes sir, @Marauder06 . Any volunteer deserves a thank you and a heck of a lot more. It's not entitlement, it's an acknowledgement that is becoming lost in a increasingly disrespectful forgetful society. Maybe I've got it all wrong.

Glancing at the gist. The way I see it, when a person thanks a servicemember in front of their family it's is a blanket that is extended to spouse and kids. My wife agrees, she thinks wives make husbands the badasses they are and vice versa. Lastly thanking a servicemember shows that their achievements no matter how small don't go unnoticed and that servicemembers have tangible support that the nation is behind them.


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## Rapid (Oct 18, 2018)

IMO, it's a sign that Americans still respect their military.

You're much less likely to get thanked in the UK, let alone the rest of Europe. That stems from the fact that people here just don't care as much.

And while it can be a bit embarrassing/weird to accept a compliment like that, it's worth appreciating... if only for the fact that it should remind you that at least Americans still care about their Forces.


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## NFB19 (Oct 23, 2018)

To offer a unique perspective. I wear a uniform, but the only "service" I have done is go to school on the taxpayer's dime. When I was a younger Midshipman, being thanked was almost shameful because I hadn't done anything. A Marine Colonel explained it to me this way: "Don't consider it a personal thanks. Certainly, you signed on the dotted line giving the United States a blank check payable up to the amount of your life. But, rather consider it a thanks to the uniform and what it represents; all that served, are serving, and will serve in defense of what Americans hold most dear..." Now when I am thanked, I simply say "Thank you for your support" and move along. I accept it on behalf of others. When I talk to my Great Uncle, or those veterans who served in Vietnam, they are grateful that society is so generous to us now when the one they served for was not.


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## Diamondback 2/2 (Oct 23, 2018)

I'm indifferent, someone says something to me,  "well thank you" and move along.  When I was younger I felt awkward about it,  but over time you just learn to accept it and move along.  A few truly mean it,  many say it as its become a social norm, either way is fine,  as I don't think of myself as any better than anyone else.

I do tend to go out of my way to thank Vietnam vets when I notice them (hats, shirts, overhearing conversation). I do so because I think it's horrible how those guys came home and were treated years following that war. I like to think my thank you is a little more sincere then what most of us have experienced, firm hand shake, good eye contact and I appreciate your service over there.  But I'm probably just weirding dudes out and sending them into some kinda anxiety attack of "why is this fucking dude staring at me and squeezing the shit out of my hand".😆


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## Gunpowder (Oct 23, 2018)

For me..I find it awkward but give thanks and move on...for Nam, Korean and WWII vets...I'll give my appreciation and thanks for leading the way for the rest of us.  My father fought in both Korea in 52' and Nam in 67-68..it truly is an honor for me to meet those vets.


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## Box (Oct 24, 2018)

Larry David has a good understanding of "thank you for your service"



To the owners of Shadow Spear - THANKyouforyourservice
To the administrators - thankYOUforyour service
To the moderators, past and present - thankyouforYOURservice
To the members - thankyouforyourSERVICE


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## Ooh-Rah (Oct 24, 2018)

Box said:


> Larry David has a good understanding of "thank you for your service"
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Funny as F....but....I hate that they made the Vet a pussy who got butthurt over someone not 'thanking' him.


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## Devildoc (Oct 24, 2018)

Ooh-Rah said:


> Funny as F....but....I hate that they made the* Vet a pussy who got butthurt over someone not 'thanking' him*.



I used to work with a guy like that; he's in Nashville at Vanderbilt now.  He would also ask everyone, up front, "do you have a military discount?"  He made vets look bad, and I told him.


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## Grunt (Oct 24, 2018)

Devildoc said:


> I used to work with a guy like that; he's in Nashville at Vanderbilt now.  He would also ask everyone, up front, "do you have a military discount?"  He made vets look bad, and I told him.



There are crumbs in every profession and he certainly qualifies as one. I really can't stand those types. They are the clowns of the group and simply can't be taken seriously...ever.


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## Muppet (Oct 24, 2018)

I've gotten it once or twice over the years, if I wore an 82nd T shirt or something. Usually, I get a nod when other dudes my age or even dudes from this era, see my memorial bracelet.

I've gotten more "thanks" while wearing my paramedic uniform. Honestly, I appreciate it but feel weird when thanked.


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## digrar (Oct 24, 2018)

SpitfireV said:


> People would think you're weird if you do it here. I've had people thank "you for being on the border and protecting us" and it's fucking strange. Yeah I have to look at some awful stuff and deal with shitheads but that's what I'm paid to do. Noone does anything for free.
> 
> If I see an old fella with an RSA or military lapel badge I'll often ask where they served and I've had some interesting conversations. But if you started thanking them everyone involved would get weirded out. That's our culture though.




Same on this side of the Tasman. People generally get it out of their system on ANZAC day (and even then it's shown by attending the services and marches, not by cornering vets and actually thanking them) and the rest of the time we're left alone.


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## SpitfireV (Oct 26, 2018)

digrar said:


> Same on this side of the Tasman. People generally get it out of their system on ANZAC day (and even then it's shown by attending the services and marches, not by cornering vets and actually thanking them) and the rest of the time we're left alone.



I think most people realise the intent is to remember the fallen and not celebrate the living.


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## DocCallahan (Oct 26, 2018)

First experience with this was when I was a wee lil firefighter. I was sitting on my grandpas front porch and my little cousin was sitting on my grandpas lap asking him about his time in the Army. He called my grandpa a hero which he sure as hell is to me. My grandpa pointed at me and said “Him and all the other firefighters, EMT’s and police officers are the heroes”.
I just sat there in silence completely taken aback. I sure didn’t feel like it, I felt weird coming from him. At that time the biggest thing I had done was spent a week helping fight a forestfire in Linville. Hell it makes me a bit uncomfortable even recalling it, me being as young as I am and my grandpa’s stories blow my mind everytime, could never fill half his shoe and I’m definitely no hero was just part of a team, especially compared to the fine people on this forum or even other EMS/LEO I do miss being a rural firefighter though at times, was a kickass gig with some crazy ass dudes, good guys though.

Though I’ve yet to be called white trash for being in the military I’ve gotten quite a few slurs when I was FF, good times. I just say, thank you, I couldn’t do it without you.

I think we should be pretty greatful people support, ask some Vietnam vets how they were treated by the people. We’re pretty lucky people support the military so much, regardless of how weird it makes us feel.

What’s way more weird to me, is asking for a mil discount. So I don’t.


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## The Hate Ape (Oct 30, 2018)

Usually to lighten up the seriousness of the situation I respond to TYFYS with: "Thank you for your tax dollars"


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## DasBoot (Oct 30, 2018)

The Hate Ape said:


> Usually to lighten up the seriousness of the situation I respond to TYFYS with: "Thank you for your tax dollars"


“Thank you for your support” and “don’t thank me thank my recruiter” are my favorites.


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## 4859 (Nov 9, 2018)

No.

Hell no. Constant source of infuriation.

Latest one was at the grocery store. I walk with a permanent limp. Got blown up too many times, and after a while it caught up to me. So I go to get some Jack Daniels from the back section where they keep the liquor with a separate cash out (which I use to make a bitchin moppin and bbq sauce). And she sneers at me and says "I think you've had enough".

I said excuse me? 

"You're already drunk, I can see you stumbling"

I explained to her that I am a medically retired veteran, and that's how I ALWAYS walk. Which she still refused to believe and blathered on with her bullshit until I pulled out my retired military card to shut her up.

To which came the inevitable rehearsed line:

"Thank you for y-"

Cut her off 

Stop. Don't you dare. Ring it up.

Can't stand it. Fake as hell. Don't use my service to pat yourself on the back.


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## Ooh-Rah (Feb 17, 2019)

Today I was in a grocery store wearing a Marine Corps ball cap.  A woman was running the checkout line and she said, "Thank you for your service..." (I'm tuning out)...and adds..."I appreciate your willingness to defend our country and our constitution."   

I paused and thanked her for making her gratitude 'real' and say 'why' she was thankful.  I've never had anyone do that part before, it made me feel good.


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## SpitfireV (Feb 18, 2019)

I hope you then shot her, looted the corpse and stole her horse in proper RDR2 fashion.


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## compforce (Feb 18, 2019)

Honestly, I don't care if they say it.  If they do, I always just say "thank you" and continue like it didn't happen.  I'm not above taking the discounts though.  I don't actively seek them out or ask about them, but if I know they have one, I'll take it.

Just a quick note...   Lowe's has a 10% Military Discount.  I was wearing a military themed ball cap and the cashier asked me what the hat was about.  When I said it was related to something I had done in the military, she told me about the discount.  I signed up because I am doing a lot of work on the house this year so why not... They include ALL Veterans in the program, not just current Service Members.
https://www.lowes.com/l/in-store-services.html#MilitaryDiscountProgram


Oh, and parking...


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## Devildoc (Feb 18, 2019)

compforce said:


> Honestly, I don't care if they say it.  If they do, I always just say "thank you" and continue like it didn't happen.  I'm not above taking the discounts though.  I don't actively seek them out or ask about them, but if I know they have one, I'll take it.
> 
> Just a quick note...   Lowe's has a 10% Military Discount.  I was wearing a military themed ball cap and the cashier asked me what the hat was about.  When I said it was related to something I had done in the military, she told me about the discount.  I signed up because I am doing a lot of work on the house this year so why not... They include ALL Veterans in the program, not just current Service Members.
> https://www.lowes.com/l/in-store-services.html#MilitaryDiscountProgram
> ...



It's also linked to your Lowes reward card thing, that you swipe.  They always end the transaction with "thank you for your service."


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## DasBoot (Feb 18, 2019)

Chicks have started saying “thank you for your service” via tinder when I tell them I’m Army. My typical response- “I’m just here to service you.” Thus far I’d say I’m at 50/50 success... considering 50% of the time they like it, and 50% of the time I’m banned from Tinder...


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## Marine0311 (Feb 18, 2019)

If they thank me I say "it was an honor to serve".
If they don't I go about my way.

You can thank me by voting, writing your elected officials and getting out the to advocate change.


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## Devildoc (Feb 18, 2019)

If they thank me, I go all Sam Kinison on them:






Just kidding....


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## compforce (Feb 18, 2019)

DasBoot said:


> Chicks have started saying “thank you for your service” via tinder when I tell them I’m Army. My typical response- “I’m just here to service you.” Thus far I’d say I’m at 50/50 success... considering 50% of the time they like it, and 50% of the time I’m banned from Tinder...



So you're saying that you only tried it twice...


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## DasBoot (Feb 18, 2019)

compforce said:


> So you're saying that you only tried it twice...


Multiply that by two.


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## Ooh-Rah (Feb 18, 2019)

Devildoc said:


> If they thank me, I go all Sam Kinison on them:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


What fucking kills me about that video is that it was 1986.  Vietnam was just 15 years or so ago....today Vietnam was 45 years or so ago.

1986 was like yesterday to me.  I was 17 and loving life.

Father-Time stops for no one.


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## Devildoc (Feb 18, 2019)

Ooh-Rah said:


> What fucking kills me about that video is that it was 1986.  Vietnam was just 15 years or so ago....today Vietnam was 45 years or so ago.
> 
> *1986 was like yesterday to me.  I was 17 and loving life.*
> 
> *Father-Time stops for no one.*



Hard agree...


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## Totentanz (Feb 18, 2019)

Devildoc said:


> It's also linked to your Lowes reward card thing, that you swipe.  They always end the transaction with "thank you for your service."



Yep, that's what I've been using.  They've made it pretty easy and straightforward to use.


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## Brill (Feb 18, 2019)

DasBoot said:


> Chicks have started saying “thank you for your service” via tinder when I tell them I’m Army...


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## GOTWA (Feb 18, 2019)

lindy said:


>


This brings up a good point.  I should start thanking others for their service.  A little appreciation can go a long way.  I don't even know where I'd be without pornhub.


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## LibraryLady (Feb 18, 2019)

I have a love/hate attitude about this topic. 

If I wear military themed attire, no one assumes I'm a vet. Or they assume it comes from the husband. I've got a few things that are wimmenz vet stuff I wear and it has found me some other women vets, which is absolutely cool,  but generally it's ignored by other people.  

The men vets in my life when thanked will point me out to the thank-er and say she's a vet too, which embarrasses the thank-er and their response feels rather insincere to me for which I could care less. 

I generally end up down playing that aspect of my life to minimize the unease it generates in others.

LL


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## Gunz (Feb 18, 2019)

Devildoc said:


> If they thank me, I go all Sam Kinison on them:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I love that scene. And Sam Kinison, RIP. Best scene in that whole movie.


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