# Force Recon is in the hiz-ouse!



## Ooh-Rah (Sep 20, 2013)

Okay I cannot take it anymore!  Sitting in my local cigar shop trying to get some work done and enjoy a very fine stick.  There is this guy sitting a few feet away from me regaling a small group of guys with his animated "war stories" while he was a "Force Recon Marine" in the "sandbox".  

So far it just sounds like he's  just telling bootcamp stories.  This guy may have been a Marine, but there is NO WAY he was SOF...no fucking way.

I swear to god if I hear him say something about "black operations" I'll engage in conversation for the entertainment value alone, but for those of you are are/were SOF, I can only imagine how crazy it must drive you when you run into these guys.

If I hear the phrase "Well what we'd do as a Force Recon Marine about that..." one more time in the next hour...


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## Chopstick (Sep 20, 2013)

Pics?


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## 8654Maine (Sep 20, 2013)

First rule of fight club...


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## Marine0311 (Sep 20, 2013)

Put him in the camel clutch and humble him as The Iron Shiek would.


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## Salt USMC (Sep 20, 2013)

Ask him what color the boat house at Hereford is


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## x SF med (Sep 20, 2013)

Ask him about the "final mile"....


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## Muppet (Sep 20, 2013)

I think pics when you place him in the camel clutch while asking him about the boat house and the final mile would be awesome.

F.M.


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## pardus (Sep 21, 2013)

I remember in a bar one night, some douche was in there wearing a shirt with MARINES in huge letters on his chest.
He was bragging to everyone about what a badass sniper he was.

I just happened to be drinking with a Marine sniper, a Force Recon dude, a SOT-A guy and IIRC a SEAL. Douche was invited over and very innocently asked by myself about his service, douche starts talking... Then I say "Thats awesome, you're a real badass, let me introduce you to my friends..."

Douche looks like he's seen a ghost, starts stammering and leaves the bar very quickly


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## Muppet (Sep 21, 2013)

pardus said:


> I remember in a bar one night, some douche was in there wearing a shirt with MARINES in huge letters on his chest.
> He was bragging to everyone about what a badass sniper he was.
> 
> I just happened to be drinking with a Marine sniper, a Force Recon dude, a SOT-A guy and IIRC a SEAL. Douche was invited over and very innocently asked by myself about his service, douche starts talking... Then I say "Thats awesome, you're a real badass, let me introduce you to my friends..."
> ...


 
That is awesome. Fucking posers.

F.M.


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## Etype (Sep 21, 2013)

Just grab him by the shoulder and tell him you're part of an exercise and need his help, and that he should understand...

Then start making up crazy stuff and see what you can get him to do.


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## racing_kitty (Sep 21, 2013)

pardus said:


> I remember in a bar one night, some douche was in there wearing a shirt with MARINES in huge letters on his chest.
> He was bragging to everyone about what a badass sniper he was.
> 
> I just happened to be drinking with a Marine sniper, a Force Recon dude, a SOT-A guy and IIRC a SEAL. Douche was invited over and very innocently asked by myself about his service, douche starts talking... Then I say "Thats awesome, you're a real badass, let me introduce you to my friends..."
> ...



This is funny.  I love it when posers get outed.  It's like the one E-5 who was reclassing the 89B (ammo specialist, aka bullet counter) at the same time I was going through EOD Phase I at Redstone Arsenal.  He was rocking an unearned dive bubble and senior crab.  While that took some serious brass balls to do, it's obvious that the reason he had the testicular fortitude to do it was because there was NO BRAIN AT ALL to divert the blood flow from his minuscule genitalia.  Oddly enough, it took him getting caught in bed with an IET private before he got in trouble for it.  UGH!!!!


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## Hillclimb (Sep 21, 2013)

pardus said:


> Douche was invited over and very innocently asked by myself about his service, douche starts talking... Then I say "Thats awesome, you're a real badass, let me introduce you to my friends..."



Perfect execution. Well played.


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## AWP (Sep 21, 2013)

When I meet someone and they aren't with someone I already know or are somehow vouched for, I just assume they are full of crap. The more they talk about it to strangers, the more full of crap they are. Someone who's legit doesn't bukkake unknown persons with tales of badassery.


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## Etype (Sep 21, 2013)

Freefalling said:


> When I meet someone and they aren't with someone I already know or are somehow vouched for, I just assume they are full of crap. The more they talk about it to strangers, the more full of crap they are. Someone who's legit doesn't bukkake unknown persons with tales of badassery.


The way I look at it, the average person could never really understand or respect the merits of X, Y, or Z- so it's better to not get into it.


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## Marine0311 (Sep 21, 2013)

Etype said:


> The way I look at it, the average person could never really understand or respect the merits of X, Y, or Z- so it's better to not get into it.



I like outing posers.


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## TLDR20 (Sep 21, 2013)

Here is how a normal convo goes with me.
Me: "I was in the Military."
Them: "What branch?"
Me:"Army"
Them:"what did you do?"
Me: "Medic".

Then depending on who I am with/who I am talking to either my wife will be like "he was a green beret....." 

Or if they are a vet they will ask me unit, I say seventh group and that is normally it.


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## amlove21 (Sep 21, 2013)

I love saying, "Air Force" after my standard answers of "I am in the military" or "Government work" to the questions of "What do you do?"

The unwavering reactions I get (Air Force, hahaha, AF sucks, you're not really in the military, etc) are always waaaaaaayyyyy funnier to the people with me, mainly because I usually totally agree with their bashing and badassness for as long as I possibly can. 

It's always great.


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## 0699 (Sep 21, 2013)

cback0220 said:


> Here is how a normal convo goes with me.
> Me: "I was in the Military."
> Them: "What branch?"
> Me:"Army"
> ...


 
Glad to see I'm not the only geting my "discreetness" undermined by the wife...


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## Muppet (Sep 21, 2013)

I usually say I was President Lyndon Johnson's body guard until they realize I am not old enough. Then I say I was a space ship gunner and they give that black stare. Or, my friends on facebook refer to me as an Airborne Ranger cause they don't know that the 2 are not always together. I try to educate them but comes over deaf or retarded ears.

F.M.


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## AWP (Sep 21, 2013)

I can't wait for my first run-in with someone on the UBL raid.


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## CDG (Sep 21, 2013)

amlove21 said:


> I love saying, "Air Force" after my standard answers of "I am in the military" or "Government work" to the questions of "What do you do?"
> 
> The unwavering reactions I get (Air Force, hahaha, AF sucks, you're not really in the military, etc) are always waaaaaaayyyyy funnier to the people with me, mainly because I usually totally agree with their bashing and badassness for as long as I possibly can.
> 
> It's always great.



I usually get asked what plane I fly.  I did get a girl to legitimately believe I was a door gunner on the space shuttle a couple weeks ago.  Told her we flew patrols to protect our satellites from the Chinese.  I made up this whole intricate spacesuit/retention system that I wore to keep me connected to the shuttle.  I love 19-year-olds.


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## Muppet (Sep 21, 2013)

CDG said:


> I usually get asked what plane I fly.  I did get a girl to legitimately believe I was a door gunner on the space shuttle a couple weeks ago.  Told her we flew patrols to protect our satellites from the Chinese.  I made up this whole intricate spacesuit/retention system that I wore to keep me connected to the shuttle.  I love 19-year-olds.


 
Well done brother. Well done. 1 thing my dad always told me was that it does not matter what you are, a garbage collector, tax person or Paratrooper. If you do the job well and are proud of what you did, he would not care what I grew up to be. I wanted to be a Navy SEAL but then decided to take after my pop and be a Paratrooper and medic. He told a few, not a lot of stories from Nam.

F.M.


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## SkrewzLoose (Sep 21, 2013)

Freefalling said:


> I can't wait for my first run-in with someone on the UBL raid.


Happened to me at a bar in Newport Beach.  Kid went from being in the USMC > MARSOC > supporting ST6 on the raid > "you know our chopper went down, right?" (no shit, this kid actually said that)
I'm pretty sure I mused about this elsewhere with more detail.


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## Muppet (Sep 21, 2013)

SkrewzLoose said:


> Happened to me at a bar in Newport Beach.  Kid went from being in the USMC > MARSOC > supporting ST6 on the raid > "you know our chopper went down, right?" (no shit, this kid actually said that)
> I'm pretty sure I mused about this elsewhere with more detail.


 
Dude was prolly like 18 or something, with pimples.

F.M.


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## SkrewzLoose (Sep 21, 2013)

Firemedic said:


> Dude was prolly like 18 or something, with pimples.
> 
> F.M.


I'll give him 24 years old, at the most.  He also kept saying that he wasn't supposed to talk about it...


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## AWP (Sep 21, 2013)

SkrewzLoose said:


> I'll give him 24 years old, at the most.  He also kept saying that he wasn't supposed to talk about it...


 
Pull out your cell phone, remind him that you know he signed an NDA, and you have to report this incident to your unit's Security Officer.


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## Muppet (Sep 21, 2013)

Freefalling said:


> Pull out your cell phone, remind him that you know he signed an NDA, and you have to report this incident to your unit's Security Officer.


 
And then stick a fork in his fucking eye and watch him bleed and cry...

F.M.


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## Muppet (Sep 21, 2013)

I tell girls that the movie The Bourne Ultimatum was made after my experiences...

F.M.


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## 0699 (Sep 21, 2013)

Firemedic said:


> I tell girls that the movie The Bourne Ultimatum was made after my experiences...
> 
> F.M.


 
I'm still pissed that _24_ never paid me residuals for using my life story...


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## Red Flag 1 (Sep 21, 2013)

Freefalling said:


> Pull out your cell phone, remind him that you know he signed an NDA, and you have to report this incident to your unit's Security Officer.



I always liked the Star Trek "Search for Spock" scene in the bar when Ole Doc McCoy is trying to get a ride to Genisis, 



.,.


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## Hillclimb (Sep 21, 2013)

Firemedic said:


> I tell girls that the movie The Bourne Ultimatum was made after my experiences...
> 
> F.M.



That's more believable than mine. I've been telling them mine is based off The Wolverine.


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## Dame (Sep 22, 2013)

0699 said:


> Glad to see I'm not the only geting my "discreetness" undermined by the wife...


Your women are proud of you guys. 



CDG said:


> I usually get asked what plane I fly.  I did get a girl to legitimately believe I was a door gunner on the space shuttle a couple weeks ago.  Told her we flew patrols to protect our satellites from the Chinese.  I made up this whole intricate spacesuit/retention system that I wore to keep me connected to the shuttle.  I love 19-year-olds.


ROFLMAO. You little shit.


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