# Dealing with failure at CA selection



## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

I went to my first selection this week and humiliated myself. I botched the PT test, something I didn’t  imagine happening. What a slice of humble pie. I now have 6 months to rectify this.

I have had failures in my life but this is hitting me harder than I could of imagined because it’s 100% on me. I was listening to some of these other guys making excuses and saying they were not coming back and I just can’t understand it.  I can’t imagine giving up now. 

I feel like in order to prepare the right way I’m going to have to alienate friends and family to really focus properly. 

What did you do the first time you failed ? How did you grow from it?


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## x SF med (Apr 19, 2019)

When you say Selection, do you mean SFRE?


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## DA SWO (Apr 19, 2019)

benroliver said:


> I went to my first selection this week and humiliated myself. I botched the PT test, something I didn’t  imagine happening. What a slice of humble pie. I now have 6 months to rectify this.
> 
> I have had failures in my life but this is hitting me harder than I could of imagined because it’s 100% on me. I was listening to some of these other guys making excuses and saying they were not coming back and I just can’t understand it.  I can’t imagine giving up now.
> 
> ...


Why will preparing better alienate family or friends?


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## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

x SF med said:


> When you say Selection, do you mean SFRE?


 Just Civil Affairs selection.


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## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

DA SWO said:


> Why will preparing better alienate family or friends?



They are expecting me to take leave this summer and visit since it has been a while and I think that would be a terrible distraction for training.


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## DocCallahan (Apr 19, 2019)

benroliver said:


> They are expecting me to take leave this summer and visit since it has been a while and I think that would be a terrible distraction for training.



Well depending on how much you have to commit to leave you could take a short leave. 

I haven’t even made it to a selection. Hell, I didn’t even get the contract I went for and am waiting til the new FY. 

With my humble opinion, as insignificant as it is. I wouldn’t alienate/burn bridges but I wouldn’t over extend yourself, I’ve been very bad at dealing with failure and denying the fact that I’ve failed to myself so I’ve been trying to humble myself, pick up my feet and get a better attitude.


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## Marauder06 (Apr 19, 2019)

I failed to achieve standards during the PT pre-test for Ranger School.  I never went back.  I regret it, but I don't dwell on it.

You can afford to take a little leave during a six-month trainup.  In fact, it will probably help you avoid over-training.  

Piece of advice from someone who has been in 24 years:  No matter how hard you work, and how much you achieve, eventually the Army won't be there for you anymore.  You'll either die, leave, retire, or get kicked out.  When that happens... it's all gone.  So at some point the Army won't be there for you.  But if you do it right, your family will.  Take care of your family first and the rest will follow.  Or it won't.  But at least you won't be sitting in you cheap apartment all by yourself, saying, "Well, I got to be CA but... ."

Leave and training are not mutually exclusive.  Reflect on what you did, make a plan (that includes plenty of time with friends/fam) and get back after it.  Things tend to work out the way they are supposed to, just not always on the timeline or in the manner we thought we wanted.

If you need further motivation, maybe one day I'll tell the story of how I got a "below center of mass / do not retain / show cause board" OER as a lieutenant.


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## DA SWO (Apr 19, 2019)

benroliver said:


> They are expecting me to take leave this summer and visit since it has been a while and I think that would be a terrible distraction for training.


How badly did you fail the PT Test?  I would think a couple hours per day training wouldn't kill a vacation.


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## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

DA SWO said:


> How badly did you fail the PT Test?  I would think a couple hours per day training wouldn't kill a vacation.



I didn’t fail by much, it was my run that wasn’t up to standard but I made some mistakes that cost me critical points during the push ups and sit 

I think I’m just trying to punish myself because I’m so disappointed.


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## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

Marauder06 said:


> I failed to achieve standards during the PT pre-test for Ranger School.  I never went back.  I regret it, but I don't dwell on it.
> 
> You can afford to take a little leave during a six-month trainup.  In fact, it will probably help you avoid over-training.
> 
> ...


 
That sounds like an interesting story lol

Thank you for the replies everyone. The first time I posted on this site over 2 years ago I was still a civilian wondering if I would even get through MEPS.  I’ll get there.


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## Marauder06 (Apr 19, 2019)

benroliver said:


> That sounds like an interesting story lol
> 
> Thank you for the replies everyone. The first time I posted on this site over 2 years ago I was still a civilian wondering if I would even get through MEPS.  I’ll get there.




I'll make it a case study.  ;)


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## ThunderHorse (Apr 19, 2019)

benroliver said:


> I went to my first selection this week and humiliated myself. I botched the PT test, something I didn’t  imagine happening. What a slice of humble pie. I now have 6 months to rectify this.
> 
> I have had failures in my life but this is hitting me harder than I could of imagined because it’s 100% on me. I was listening to some of these other guys making excuses and saying they were not coming back and I just can’t understand it.  I can’t imagine giving up now.
> 
> ...


If you can't take two weeks to go home and see you Family...

You have a six month train up to get much fitter.  Look at this as an opportunity.  But a week or even two won't destroy your fitness.  Heck, every time I took leave I was always active.  Take the leave, train and enjoy yourself.


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## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

On a side note, driving through Feyettville should count as a combat deployment


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## Teufel (Apr 19, 2019)

Pick yourself up, address what went wrong, and do your best next time.


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## SpongeBob*24 (Apr 19, 2019)

LEAVE is always the ultimate test in WILL POWER to stay focused on PT because you are catching up with friends and partying and drinking til 0400.

Guess what, get up and PT your butt off.  That first Bailey's and coffee aint going down til post work out and that's about 0800.  The 750 of Baileys is done and its time to Transition to IPA's around NOON.  By then maybe you have Pants on.

The equation is simple:  PT alot, Eat alot, drink alot, spend time with family, rinse REPEAT!!!!

LEAVE shouldn't be different then any other day....Good luck!


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## RackMaster (Apr 19, 2019)

SpongeBob*24 said:


> LEAVE is always the ultimate test in WILL POWER to stay focused on PT because you are catching up with friends and partying and drinking til 0400.
> 
> Guess what, get up and PT your butt off.  That first Bailey's and coffee aint going down til post work out and that's about 0800.  The 750 of Baileys is done and its time to Transition to IPA's around NOON.  By then maybe you have Pants on.
> 
> ...




The bolded is key!  That equation is how I spent almost 13 years in the Army.  Train hard, fight hard and party hard.


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## benroliver (Apr 19, 2019)

Now these are some inspirational posts


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## 0699 (Apr 20, 2019)

During visits to my in-laws, they motivated me to do two workouts a day.


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