Oh Florida.....

[Muppet]

I love my dog's but if I could have a few trained gators in my yard to keep my fucktard neighbor away from my dog's. I build them a moat!

With laser beams on their foreheads?

 

[Kraut783]

 

[RackMaster]

With laser beams on their foreheads?

And back mounted surface to air missiles.

 

[AWP]

According to the Bureau of Shit I Just Made Up, households with alligators see less crime than households with dogs. Some estimates place the drop in crime as much as 54,0000% under the national average.

I have a Glock, but I'm moving to a Gator. YMMV

 

[Devildoc]

According to the Bureau of Shit I Just Made Up, households with alligators see less crime than households with dogs. Some estimates place the drop in crime as much as 54,0000% under the national average.

I have a Glock, but I'm moving to a Gator. YMMV

Yes, but will it wear a t-shirt?

 

[RackMaster]

Yes, but will it wear a t-shirt?

3 piece suit and a fedora.

 

[Devildoc]

3 piece suit and a fedora.

Google images does not disappoint:

 

[AWP]

Yes, but will it wear a t-shirt?

Sir, it is an alligator, it will wear whatever it damn well wants.

 

[Box]

According to the Bureau of Shit I Just Made Up, households with alligators see less crime than households with dogs. Some estimates place the drop in crime as much as 54,0000% under the national average.

I have a Glock, but I'm moving to a Gator. YMMV

If you miss with a Glock, the bullets wont turn around and come back for another try. If you miss with an alligator - it wont matter, the alligator will just try harder next time.

 

[Gunz]

"Why do you want to go to Florida? It's hot and sticky and full of guns." -- Jeremy Clarkson

 

[Steve1839]

"Why do you want to go to Florida? It's hot and sticky and full of guns." -- Jeremy Clarkson

Looks like someone is channeling Devil Anse Hatfield...?

 

[Gunz]

Looks like someone is channeling Devil Anse Hatfield...?

I'm actually involved a land dispute right now with this arrogant little punk-ass root weevil who bought some land nearby. I ain't shot him yet...but it's still early.

 

[Steve1839]

I'm actually involved a land dispute right now with this arrogant little punk-ass root weevil who bought some land nearby. I ain't shot him yet...but it's still early.

Get it surveyed.

 

[Gunz]

Get it surveyed.

Yes, sir.

This little 30-something rich bastard just wants to use the private road that goes through my property--that I built and maintain--because he wants to rent out some barn apartment he has and the road into his property is twisty and narrow but perfectly accessible. So he thinks prospective tenants will get turned off by it. He's a whiner who's come out here from the city to fuck things up. He's got no case...but it's just a big pain in the ass for me to deal with...and unfortunately, unlike Devil Anse, I can't shoot my way out it.

 

[Steve1839]

Yes, sir.

This little 30-something rich bastard just wants to use the private road that goes through my property--that I built and maintain--because he wants to rent out some barn apartment he has and the road into his property is twisty and narrow but perfectly accessible. So he thinks prospective tenants will get turned off by it. He's a whiner who's come out here from the city to fuck things up. He's got no case...but it's just a big pain in the ass for me to deal with...and unfortunately, unlike Devil Anse, I can't shoot my way out it.

I'd post no trespassing signs at the entrance to the road...won't stop him from using it until you notify the authorities...also, pisses on your fire hydrant. If he's only been there a short time, he'd have a hard time claiming a prescriptive right, but that's always a go-to for squatters and their ilk...anyway, that's my professional, yet unsolicited advice, only legal in the states where I hold a valid survey license...

 

[DA SWO]

Yes, sir.

This little 30-something rich bastard just wants to use the private road that goes through my property--that I built and maintain--because he wants to rent out some barn apartment he has and the road into his property is twisty and narrow but perfectly accessible. So he thinks prospective tenants will get turned off by it. He's a whiner who's come out here from the city to fuck things up. He's got no case...but it's just a big pain in the ass for me to deal with...and unfortunately, unlike Devil Anse, I can't shoot my way out it.

Can you afford a lawyer?
If so, ask if you can hit him with a restraining order.

 

[Gunz]

Can you afford a lawyer?
If so, ask if you can hit him with a restraining order.

Yeah, thanks, sir…I think I’m gonna have to do something like that before this pudknocker gets the hint.

 

[AWP]

According to Fox the nutjob who set himself on fire today is from?

Yeah.

 

[Ooh-Rah]

Yeah, thanks, sir…I think I’m gonna have to do something like that before this pudknocker gets the hint.

Maybe introduce him to TR.

 

[Gunz]

Maybe introduce him to TR.

TR’s a big Teddy bear…but with very scary teeth.