YOU DON'T NEED THE FBI TO TELL US WHAT WE'VE KNOWN FOR OVER 30 YEARS: MONDAY IS STILL FUCKING AWESOME!!!!1!!!!!!!1111!!!! YOU GOTTA' GO INTO THE DAY LIKE RIC FLAIR!!!!! BE THE ROLEX WEARIN’, DIAMOND RING WEARIN’, KISS STEALIN’...WAIT!!!! DO NOT BE LIKE RIC FLAIR BECAUSE THAT'S SEXUAL ASSAULT!!!!! IF YOU DO STEAL ONE, TAKE YOUR WHEELIN’ DEALIN’, LIMOUSINE RIDIN’, JET FLYIN’ ASS TO A COUNTRY WITHOUT AN EXTRADITION TREATY!!!!! AND RETAKE YOUR SHARP TRAINING YOU FUCKING PIG!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LIKE PUDDING POPS!!!!!!
MONDAY'S A DAY WITH NO LIMITS SO DON'T LIMIT YOURSELF!!!!!! JUMP ON THE DAY LIKE A BUM ON A HAM SANDWICH!!!!!!!! THE MAXIMUM EFFECTIVE RANGE OF AN EXCUSE IS 0 FUCKING METERS!!!!!! STOP YOUR WHINING, STOP YOUR CRYING, AND THANK WHATEVER GOD YOU BELIEVE IN THAT YOU'RE NOT BEING CALLED TO TESTIFY BEFORE THE US SENATE!!!!!!1!!!!!! FUCK THAT!!!!!! UNLIKE A CLINTON INTERN, THAT'S SOMETHING WE CAN ALL GET BEHIND!!!!!
DON'T LET MONDAY BE A BLUE DRESS!!!!!! TAKE IT DOWN TO FORT MARCY AND SHOW IT WHO'S IN CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!
AND IF YOU'RE DRINKING COFFEE THIS MORNING, REMEMBER THAT COFFEE'S FOR CLOSERS!!!!!!!!!
MONDAY'S A DAY WITH NO LIMITS SO DON'T LIMIT YOURSELF!!!!!! JUMP ON THE DAY LIKE A BUM ON A HAM SANDWICH!!!!!!!! THE MAXIMUM EFFECTIVE RANGE OF AN EXCUSE IS 0 FUCKING METERS!!!!!! STOP YOUR WHINING, STOP YOUR CRYING, AND THANK WHATEVER GOD YOU BELIEVE IN THAT YOU'RE NOT BEING CALLED TO TESTIFY BEFORE THE US SENATE!!!!!!1!!!!!! FUCK THAT!!!!!! UNLIKE A CLINTON INTERN, THAT'S SOMETHING WE CAN ALL GET BEHIND!!!!!
DON'T LET MONDAY BE A BLUE DRESS!!!!!! TAKE IT DOWN TO FORT MARCY AND SHOW IT WHO'S IN CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!
AND IF YOU'RE DRINKING COFFEE THIS MORNING, REMEMBER THAT COFFEE'S FOR CLOSERS!!!!!!!!!