Valentines Day

Ambush alright! One year Mrs. "Funky Stuff" and I agreed that it was a BS holiday and were not going to exchange gifts as it was dumb.

Holly fuck me running the wrath of swirling shit and tears I caught for that mistake. She thought I was kidding and going to suprise her with something.
 
Downtown “Funky Stuff” Malone🍆 said:
Ambush alright! One year Mrs. "Funky Stuff" and I agreed that it was a BS holiday and were not going to exchange gifts as it was dumb.

Holly fuck me running the wrath of swirling shit and tears I caught for that mistake. She thought I was kidding and going to suprise her with something.
Click to expand...

I just fucking laughed out loud bro.

M.
 
Was not a good day my friends, not at all.

Good thing she is a sucker for snowcrab legs so off to Red Lobster we went. Moving forward I was advised that no holiday is aviodable. She's not high maintenance or anything just a girl I guess. This year was a cute card and a box of candy.

She told me after we got back from the gym this morning that I was to get a "blowie" once she got out of the shower but I was in the middle of my pre run bowel movement. So looks like Downtown missed the Misses going downtown. ;-)
 
Trying to figure out the quantity of flowers, chocolate, and spa days I would need to be able to use the "I wouldn't deport you" one @Ooh-Rah . I'm thinking more than I can afford, but oh..sweet Jesus it would be worth it.
 
Ocoka said:
Fuck.

@Ooh-Rah gets a gun on V-Day. Did you're wife buy it? Because if she didn't pay for it, it doesn't count as a Valentines gift.

@racing_kitty summed up my opinion of Valentines Day. It's fucking stupid. And gay.

I watched the death-march of whipped curs, of brow-beaten, down-trodden, ballsless, simpering, emasculated wimps and femdom-humiliated thralls, sheepishly shuffling in shame from the supermarket, clinging desperately to their decaying, week-old, plastic-wrapped flower bouquets and fucking heart-shaped "I love you" milar helium balloons, tormented brainwashed fools staggering home to their cesspit of suburban hell where some pitiless money-crazed wench waits to sink her malevolent claws into their living pulsating entrails...

Yeah. Enjoy your Valentines Day.
Click to expand...

But I do agree...
 
All funny shit aside my wife is a solid woman. She stuck with me when I decided to go back active duty and the pay cut. She is down with the lifestyle and supports me without question. If a card and some sweets keep her happy and feeling appreciated I can dig that.

We go back almost 30 years. Little sister to one of my best friends.

She read this thread and about pissed herself laughing.
 
We made dinner, I bought a bottle on Ninth Island champagne, it’s from an island off Australia. FFS.
I bought her a beautiful orchid...naw...💕

Well it was $5.00 reduced from $75 ( I kid you not)! Yep, Ima cheap cunt.

Guess she saw me coming, buys me a faggoty pair of board shorts. No escape now, I have to wear ‘em. Farkin, V Day.
 

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