Not Work Safe .
- Thread starter Ooh-Rah
- Start date
^^^^Fucking hilarious
Pure gold
I did this at a Home Depot a few years back.
And you still do right
...
And you still do right
Baby school...unless it's in a crowded elevator and you stick around to claim responsibility.
Sooo... When my Dad retired from the Navy in '82. The boat he was on, USS Ponce, was at Brooklyn naval yard. I was a 20 year old Corporal at the time.
We decided to walking tour around NYC. To include the Empire State Building. Our family group was about 5 deep to include my Mom.
As we got in the elevator, I had already been cooking up a blaster in my gut. Which was unleashed on the ~20 or so victims in the elevator. The tourist elevator that doesn't stop anywhere but at the bottom.
About two floors down it came came out of my ass and into my sister's face first. As she was directly behind me. It quickly permeated the now lethal "gas chamber" faster than stink, pun for sure. My Mom could only turn her head around enough in the packed elevator. To give me the "I am going to kill you" eye. My wife, at the time, was behind and to the right. Vomited all over some stranger's back. Which was the force multiplier necessary. To initiate sympathetic vomiting from about half of the space's occupants.
At the bottom of the ride, when the doors opened. The massive explosion of shit and barfed on humanity. Literally trampled the fancily dressed operator/bellman. Like he was at the festival seating WHO concert!
I sat back watching the carnage and did a BDA, ~75% effective against my intended targets.
I am a buck nasty motherfucker when the occasion suits. Lol
Oh, my only consequence was looking for a shitter. To discard my now full skivvies
Eta: Oh it was pretty clear who did it. So I did not need a formal proclamation. That I was the dirty bastard what assaulted them with flatulence akin to kissing a bison's asshole
Enjoy
"
R.Caerbannog
Verified Military
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2015
- Messages
- 2,451
R.Caerbannog
Verified Military
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2015
- Messages
- 2,451
Wait for it!!!
R.Caerbannog
Verified Military
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2015
- Messages
- 2,451
What did space force put on its sandwich? There's a shorts pop-up that obscures everything.
I'm guessing shit or some sort of shredded beef.
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