Inside a PEO Soldier planning/ brainstorming session:
"Okay team, what should our priorities be for the upcoming year? What do our soldiers need on the battlefield?"
"Light, durable, fire resistant combat uniforms?"
"We have those."
"We do?"
(Colonel stares daggers at the offending party)
"Um, what if we had a universal camo..."
(Daggers)
"Can we reduce the weight a soldier carries? Lighter plates would be a good start."
"Nah. We'll let those SOF guys do it, contract with some former SOF guys to design it, and then we'll come in and buy whatever we need so there's no point in spending money on that."
"Well...Afghanistan has shown us that the 5.56 as fired from an M-4 lacks killing power...."
(Daggers) "First, it is "stopping power" if you want to use such a term. Second, you've been reading the internet again, haven't you? What, is this where you say we need to bring back the ole' .30 cal that was good enough for our granddaddies?"
"Well Sir, a 6.8..."
(Daggers) Jesus Christ, not this shit again. What else?"
(silence)
"Boots?"
"Nope."
"S-s-socks?"
"Nope."
"A new and improved mess kit made from titanium?"
"That has promise. Write that down."
"Kevlar-reinforced reflective belts?"
"Fobbits need protection too. Great idea. Write that down."
"Flame resistant face paint?"
"Brilliant!!!! They'll give me an MSM for thinking of that unless I can submit from Qatar and then it's a Bronze Star! Get CPT Suckass on the line and tell him we need to 'inspect the troops and solicit feedback' in Qatar ASAP!"
"Leverage apps for our soliders, giving them an expensive, easily broken, unsupported-by-our-logistics-chain-and probably-lost-by-Joe-creating-an-OPSEC-nightmare iPad?"
"Are you fucking stupid? I don't have time for this shit, I'm going to Qatar."