The Moderator Election and "Safe Space" Smacktalking and Smear Campaign Thread

[AWP]

Here's your official smacktalking/ campaign thread. No "fuck you" or serious personal attacks and the other usual rules apply like no pr0n. Outlandish and unproven claims are possible, smear campaigns are G2G, and wild, impossible promises can be made.

Also, Nickleback sucks harder than your mom.

 

[Jael]

@AKkeith : Watches twilight reruns each year.

@Deathy McDeath : On the weekends rocks a flock of seagull haircut.

@Florida173 : Hates steak.

@Marauder06 : Spoils game of thrones.

@Marine0311 : Curls in the squat rack.

@metalmom : Talks on cellphone during movies.

@moobob : Who?

@pardus : Drinks wine coolers.

@Ranger Psych : Set his woobie on fire.

@Red Flag 1 : Plays dungeons and dragons on a separate forum.

@The Hate Ape : Hates bacon.

@Totentanz : Buys pardus wine coolers.

 

[Diamondback 2/2]

Damn, went down the list of names, and just shook my head in disbelief. :wall:


lol, good luck to everyone!

 

[Ooh-Rah]

Hmmm....I spy some Marines on the list...Fellow Marines MUST answer the Bat Signal -

 

[Marauder06]

OK folks, it's time to make ShadowSpear grate* again.

No more will you have to toil under the lash of oppressive non-American mods. I will build a wall along ShadowSpear's southern border, and I will make @pardus pay for it. I will strengthen ShadowSpear's military (well, at least the Military Forum) so that "no one will mess with us." If elected, I will be the greatest "jobs mod" ShadowSpear has ever had. I will get rid of ShadowSpear's gun-free zones. And I will force Nabisco to once again make Oreos in the United States.

A vote for me is a vote for 'Murica. A vote for anyone else is a vote against 'Murica.

...'Murica.






*that's right, "grate"

 

[metalmom]

Heya Jael

Not going to go throw myself at the other runners yet. Saving that. Was just wondering if you REALLY had any good lines to throw out or are you saving them for later.

Just before I start smack talking I have a vow.

I pledge to be the best-sorry, one of the best with teaching and it will be a learning curve. I also pledge-though I think I am a very nice person still can get tough when needed. Lastly, I pledge NOT to build a wall around Shadowspear and have other people pay for it. Haha Jael-you just got trumped.

 

[metalmom]

OK folks, it's time to make ShadowSpear grate* again.

No more will you have to toil under the lash of oppressive non-American mods. I will build a wall along ShadowSpear's southern border, and I will make @pardus pay for it. I will strengthen ShadowSpear's military (well, at least the Military Forum) so that "no one will mess with us." If elected, I will be the greatest "jobs mod" ShadowSpear has ever had. I will get rid of ShadowSpear's gun-free zones. And I will force Nabisco to once again make Oreos in the United States.

A vote for me is a vote for 'Murica. A vote for anyone else is a vote against 'Murica.

...'Murica.






*that's right, "grate"

Are you kidding me. We typed about the wall at the same time. Can we get into cahoots until we get rid of most

 

[Jael]

Eywitness footage of metalmom!! SHOCKING!!!

 

[DocIllinois]

OK folks, it's time to make ShadowSpear grate* again.

No more will you have to toil under the lash of oppressive non-American mods. I will build a wall along ShadowSpear's southern border, and I will make @pardus pay for it. I will strengthen ShadowSpear's military (well, at least the Military Forum) so that "no one will mess with us." If elected, I will be the greatest "jobs mod" ShadowSpear has ever had. I will get rid of ShadowSpear's gun-free zones. And I will force Nabisco to once again make Oreos in the United States.

A vote for me is a vote for 'Murica. A vote for anyone else is a vote against 'Murica.

...'Murica.






*that's right, "grate"

@Marauder06: You know words. You have the best words. This is swaying me right out of the gate.

 

[metalmom]

OK Baby boy we are on. check it.

 

[AWP]

@Ooh-Rah let's not post the bloody results. They are blocked to those who haven't voted for a reason.

 

[Totentanz]

@Marauder06 - you're right, such blatant appropriation of style does grate on my ears. (BAM! USED IT IN A SENTENCE AND AS A BURN!)

 

[metalmom]

So got 1 vote-but 7 days is a hell of a long time to sway you my way. For DocIllinois-I use big words as well.

Flagitation
Bablatrice
Chaterestre=means a woman thats talkative. If Mara knows his words let him use these 3 in one sentence.

 

[Salt USMC]

OK folks, it's time to make ShadowSpear grate* again.

No more will you have to toil under the lash of oppressive non-American mods. I will build a wall along ShadowSpear's southern border, and I will make @pardus pay for it. I will strengthen ShadowSpear's military (well, at least the Military Forum) so that "no one will mess with us." If elected, I will be the greatest "jobs mod" ShadowSpear has ever had. I will get rid of ShadowSpear's gun-free zones. And I will force Nabisco to once again make Oreos in the United States.

A vote for me is a vote for 'Murica. A vote for anyone else is a vote against 'Murica.

...'Murica.

C'mon gramps, you already gave up the post. You threw up your head, yelled "I QUIT!!", and proved that you can't hack it. You're the Donald Blythe of the forum - stick to education, 'cuz you've got no penchant for power.

Check it out: it takes a rough hand to get control of the -Spear. Thick, powerful hands to grasp the mighty shaft, with delicate and loving fingers to stroke it ever-so-tenderly. The shaft is thick, yet supple, and you never want to point it towards your face. Bad things always happen when you do that. You kept the Spear pointed at your face for too long, and look at the mess you made!

What this board needs is balance, a plurality of ideas. The mod staff needs another sane, liberal voice amongst the chittering hordes of moderators. Just like the light side needs the dark side, Rocky needs Apollo, and Stevie Wonder needs Paul McArtney, so too does the mod staff need another liberal voice to balance out the opposing forces. As it stands, I am the only True Liberal(TM) in this campaign, as @TLDR20 will attest.

What I promise:
*The return of Motivation Mondays!
*The indentured servitude of @Freefalling to ensure that Monday threads are posted!
*Interesting thinkpieces, succinctly quoted and summarized, that you probably won't read anyway
*Not only will I get rid of Shadowspear's gun free zones, but I will make the forum a GUN-REQUIRED ZONE. How many other candidates can promise that?
*I will ban on sight: Airsofters, gear queers, console jockeys, posers @Marauder06 and any dipshit douchebag that dare make their way into this safe space

A vote for @Deathy McDeath is a vote for progress, and a vote for the future. It's not a vote that says "Yes we can!", it's a vote that says "HOLD MY BEER AND WATCH THIS!!"

 

[Muppet]

OK folks, it's time to make ShadowSpear grate* again.

No more will you have to toil under the lash of oppressive non-American mods. I will build a wall along ShadowSpear's southern border, and I will make @pardus pay for it. I will strengthen ShadowSpear's military (well, at least the Military Forum) so that "no one will mess with us." If elected, I will be the greatest "jobs mod" ShadowSpear has ever had. I will get rid of ShadowSpear's gun-free zones. And I will force Nabisco to once again make Oreos in the United States.

A vote for me is a vote for 'Murica. A vote for anyone else is a vote against 'Murica.

...'Murica.






*that's right, "grate"

You had me an Oreo...

M.

 

[Marauder06]

You had me an Oreo...

M.

Good. Just make sure to keep it away from... whatever it is that hippie Ivy League liberal Deathy kid is doing over there in the corner.

Check it out: it takes a rough hand to get control of the -Spear. Thick, powerful hands to grasp the mighty shaft, with delicate and loving fingers to stroke it ever-so-tenderly. The shaft is thick, yet supple, and you never want to point it towards your face. Bad things always happen when you do that. You kept the Spear pointed at your face for too long, and look at the mess you made!

 

[Ooh-Rah]

The mod staff needs another sane, liberal voice amongst the chittering hordes of moderators. Just like the light side needs the dark side, Rocky needs Apollo, and Stevie Wonder needs Paul McArtney, so too does the mod staff need another liberal voice to balance out the opposing forces. As it stands, I am the only True Liberal(TM) in this campaign, as @TLDR20 will attest.

Semper Fi and all that jazz, but the thought of you and @TLDR20 paired together with Mod power frightens me as much as a Trump/Cheney ticket does you!

*I will ban on sight: Airsofters, gear queers, console jockeys, posers @Marauder06 and any dipshit douchebag that dare make their way into this safe space

On the other hand, if you can pull "this" off...it might just be worth the price of admission!

 

[DA SWO]

2 Moderators, 1 cup......

 

[Diamondback 2/2]

You ain't got a hair on your ass, you wont do it. Wont do it hell, hold my beer and watch this!

 

[Totentanz]

As it stands, I am the only True Liberal(TM) in this campaign, as @TLDR20 will attest.

I knew it. The gestation is complete and any moment now an offspring will burst out of his chest. I say we take off and nuke him from orbit; it's the only way to be sure.