What "non-standard" Items Do You Bring With You When You Deploy?

[Teufel]

I was doing an inventory of a UA (unauthorized absence) Marine's gear and one of my Marines found a fleshlight that the UA kid had stolen from him. I assumed that he would naturally write it off but he told me with a straight face, "Sir I'll just throw it in the dishwasher and it will be fine."

 

[Dame]

Ah, well, good to know.

 

[Mac_NZ]

I was doing an inventory of a UA (unauthorized absence) Marine's gear and one of my Marines found a fleshlight that the UA kid had stolen from him. I assumed that he would naturally write it off but he told me with a straight face, "Sir I'll just throw it in the dishwasher and it will be fine."

We did the same in a similar circumstance, found an 8" rubber cock...
Everyone was at a bit of a loss about what to do with it. We ended up including it on the inventory form as "Dildo, rubber 8", cost unknown".

 

[Diamondback 2/2]

I really don't take much of anything other than a labtop, iPod and camera. 1st deployment I had a PRCA rodeo ball cap and last one I took my Mr Hanky ball cap, but thats about it.

 

[TheSiatonist]

This thread is for fun- DO NOT admit to any crimes or to doing anything that will discredit your respective service.

I found this pic on another site and it brought a smile to my face:

LOL! That chick by the truck is kinda hot.

We did the same in a similar circumstance, found an 8" rubber cock...
Everyone was at a bit of a loss about what to do with it. We ended up including it on the inventory form as "Dildo, rubber 8", cost unknown".

hahahahahahahahahaahahahaha!!!!

 

[Etype]

Friend of mine has one. He says the fuckers are hard to clean.

I guess the artifical ones don't have a natural, monthly cleansing process.

 

[Dame]

OMG, they are gonna revoke my girl card cuz I'm LMAO!

 

[pardus]

Scared to...

Go on, you'll love it...


















Literally.

 

[Etype]

OMG, they are gonna revoke my girl card cuz I'm LMAO!

The Fleshlight's external dimensions may still be beneficial for a woman...

 

[Motosapian12]

I heard a funny from a Corpsman about fleshlights. He was on ship and a Marine told him that he had gotten the herps, later a few more marines kept coming in and telling him that they had the same. So he checked with every female on the ship and found out that none of them had it. He got to the bottom of it and found out that they had been sharing a fleshlight and none of the nasty assholes cleaned it. Talk about sloppy seconds...

 

[Diamondback 2/2]

I heard a funny from a Corpsman about fleshlights. He was on ship and a Marine told him that he had gotten the herps, later a few more marines kept coming in and telling him that they had the same. So he checked with every female on the ship and found out that none of them had it. He got to the bottom of it and found out that they had been sharing a fleshlight and none of the nasty assholes cleaned it. Talk about sloppy seconds...

I could have gone the rest of my life without reading this.

 

[x SF med]

I could have gone the rest of my life without reading this.

Agree... eye bleach, mental floss and a lobotomy are on order for later this evening....

 

[SpitfireV]

LOL!

 

[Manolito]

Frank do you have a brother in Spain?

 

[Etype]

I wonder, would using a fleshlight violate noise discipline?

 

[shortbrownguy]

I wonder, would using a fleshlight violate noise discipline?

Only if you moan like a porn star

 

[Chopstick]

Only if you moan like a porn star

You say that like you have some knowledge of this......

 

[LibraryLady]

K. They say confession is good for the soul.

When I deployed I had a complete works of Shakespeare that traveled with me.

LL

 

[Teufel]

I heard a funny from a Corpsman about fleshlights. He was on ship and a Marine told him that he had gotten the herps, later a few more marines kept coming in and telling him that they had the same. So he checked with every female on the ship and found out that none of them had it. He got to the bottom of it and found out that they had been sharing a fleshlight and none of the nasty assholes cleaned it. Talk about sloppy seconds...

We had something like that happen on my last deployment. The grunts had 35 cases of gonorrhea in the Afghan battalion they were training so I had my chief do a medical CSI to find out what was going on. He tells me that it's pretty simple, they were all having sex with the same girl. Except in this case, the girl was a female chicken. Man that floozy really got around.

 

[Manolito]

A Marine buddy of mine told me if you hold the chickens feet and let the wings flap it is a great ride. Or was it a Sailor?