Applying for jobs

[pardus]

I'm going to have a little rant here.
One thing that pisses me off about American culture is the insistence of paper to prove your worth.
Ive applied for several government jobs now that I could do with ease, but have been consistently turned away because I was "Unqualified" or "Lacked credentials" despite what I am actually capable of.
Well you know what you cunts who decide the hiring criteria? Fuck you, you cunt. This is what you get*, this is why you have so many fuck ups. You want cunts who can BS a paper system. So fuck you, fail. I'll laugh over here in my under-qualified self righteousness







*with regards to Secret Service guys etc... screwing up.

 

[RustyShackleford]

I'm going to have a little rant here.
One thing that pisses me off about American culture is the insistence of paper to prove your worth.
Ive applied for several government jobs now that I could do with ease, but have been consistently turned away because I was "Unqualified" or "Lacked credentials" despite what I am actually capable of.
Well you know what you cunts who decide the hiring criterial? Fuck you, you cunt. This is what you get, this is why you have so many fuck ups. You want cunts who can BS a paper system. So fuck you, fail. I'll laugh over here in my under-qualified self righteousness

I think what your problem is and is also a problem for many people applying for gov jobs (and don't take this the wrong way) is an inability to articulate your experience in the terms that a HR person is lookin for. Its no excuse but many of the people responsible for goin through these resumes have no idea when it comes to anything outside of what the job announcement indicates as qualifiers. In other words if your verbiage is even slightly different from the job announcement, these folks will DQ you.

I experienced that firsthand at my old office when they were going through resumes for an administrative position. Our admin lady, who is a really squared away person, asked me about all the military folks who applied and asked me to decipher some of the stuff on their apps. This resulted in a former navy type getting the job.

 

[Scotth]

I think what your problem is and is also a problem for many people applying for gov jobs (and don't take this the wrong way) is an inability to articulate your experience in the terms that a HR person is lookin for. Its no excuse but many of the people responsible for goin through these resumes have no idea when it comes to anything outside of what the job announcement indicates as qualifiers. In other words if your verbiage is even slightly different from the job announcement, these folks will DQ you.

I experienced that firsthand at my old office when they were going through resumes for an administrative position. Our admin lady, who is a really squared away person, asked me about all the military folks who applied and asked me to decipher some of the stuff on their apps. This resulted in a former navy type getting the job.

Just to echo that. When I was unemployed I went through a period when I wasn't getting many call backs. I reworked my resume a little but mostly focused on my cover letter. After the rework I started getting a lot more call backs. That cover letter is critical. If they don't get through that they will never look at the resume.

 

[pardus]

I think what your problem is and is also a problem for many people applying for gov jobs (and don't take this the wrong way) is an inability to articulate your experience in the terms that a HR person is lookin for. Its no excuse but many of the people responsible for goin through these resumes have no idea when it comes to anything outside of what the job announcement indicates as qualifiers. In other words if your verbiage is even slightly different from the job announcement, these folks will DQ you.

I experienced that firsthand at my old office when they were going through resumes for an administrative position. Our admin lady, who is a really squared away person, asked me about all the military folks who applied and asked me to decipher some of the stuff on their apps. This resulted in a former navy type getting the job.

I'm sure you're right.
There is also (I'm guessing after my experiences) a cookie cutter check sheet that they run down to eliminate people. One job I was turned down for was because I hadn't registered for the selective service. Never mind the fact I was too old to register for it when I immigrated here, and I was claiming veteran's preference
Then there was the position that asked about previous immigration status's... :wall:

 

[RustyShackleford]

I'm sure you're right.
There is also (I'm guessing after my experiences) a cookie cutter check sheet that they run down to eliminate people. One job I was turned down for was because I hadn't registered for the selective service. Never mind the fact I was too old to register for it when I immigrated here, and was claiming veteran's preference
Then there was the position that asked about previous immigration status's... :wall:

There is and it is crazy that someone in a position to approve or deny an application doesn't have the ability to differentiate between varying skills and experiences. As for selective service, I still had to give my number up for this job in 2004 even though I served, was honorably discharged and was preference eligible. They're just blocks that have to be checked.

Through the years I have learned, well kind of learned, how to tailor a resume for specific jobs, to include internal agency announcements. After a recent promotion, guys I have worked with in the past have asked me to help them with their resumes for certain jobs and I was utterly amazed at how guys would list a ton of shit but fail to address how their work experience and training directly applies to the position in which they are applying for.

 

[RustyShackleford]

I created a new thread IOT not derail the drunken, swashbuckling USSS thread since this topic deserves its own space. There are definitely others here who can address this much better than I have.

 

[Brill]

Maybe you shouldn't swear so much during the interview? I know they don't like it much during my performance review sessions.

 

[Dame]

Maybe you shouldn't swear so much during the interview? I know they don't like it much during my performance review sessions.

I knew there was something I was doing wrong.

 

[pardus]

 

[Teufel]

I'm sure you're right.
There is also (I'm guessing after my experiences) a cookie cutter check sheet that they run down to eliminate people. One job I was turned down for was because I hadn't registered for the selective service. Never mind the fact I was too old to register for it when I immigrated here, and I was claiming veteran's preference
Then there was the position that asked about previous immigration status's... :wall:

Well Pardus, your problem is that most of the interviewers have "do you bathe regularly" on their checklist. And you probably said c$nt several times during the interview if not on your resume somewhere.

 

[Teufel]

That's exactly how I picture your interviews going.

 

[Brill]

What language were they speaking?

 

[CQB]

Fukn A...Neville fukn Bartos & nenish tarts!

 

[CQB]

Back on track, I papered the net with resumes of different sorts. So many in fact that when I scored an interview I thought, " Who the fuck IS this?" But played the game & I'm still there. Just get the message out there cuz. Don't worry about that gay shit, do the Maori side step!
(Maori side step for those curious members)

 

[pardus]

Back on track, I papered the net with resumes of different sorts. So many in fact that when I scored an interview I thought, " Who the fuck IS this?" But played the game & I'm still there. Just get the message out there cuz. Don't worry about that gay shit, do the Maori side step!
(Maori side step for those curious members)

Incredible try!

I never liked Lomu, but credit where credit's due.

 

[pardus]

Well Pardus, your problem is that most of the interviewers have "do you bathe regularly" on their checklist. And you probably said c$nt several times during the interview if not on your resume somewhere.

We seriously need a Like and Hate option for posts.

ETA, that doesn't mean I necessarily disagree with your post, wanker.

 

[CQB]

The Wobbilies et al figured Jonah out. If he got to warp speed he was invincible, ( physics 1.01) but a short kick over his head and he couldn't change direction 180 degrees quickly to chase.

Edit: Pard, If you're up to your neck in alligators remember your mission is to drain the swamp.

 

[Etype]

Well you know what you cunts who decide the hiring criteria? Fuck you, you cunt. This is what you get*, this is why you have so many fuck ups. You want cunts who can BS a paper system. So fuck you, fail. I'll laugh over here in my under-qualified self righteousness

You're conducting DA in a UW environment.

 

[RustyShackleford]

You're conducting DA in a UW environment.

It's a shame I can't both like and agree with your post!

Speaking of DA vs UW, most of my time is spent as an advisor which is driving me nuts yet making me learn. Weird...

 

[LogDog0402]

I went through the same shit before I got my job. Sadly, I took a job that I am way over qualified for just to get my foot in the door for a federal career. I didn't even get the job through the standard USAJobs pipeline either. Somehow a guy that is a Wounded Warrior advocate was sent my civilian resume and he called me and it just went from there. My job is boring as fuck and I work with the air wing side of the Navy. I would prefer to get back to working with the Marine Corps or SOCOM. Anyway, if anyone wants this guys email address just PM me. He might be able to help you and get your foot in the door.