The biggest thing that would undermine disaffection toward their government and galvanize them against the west is any perception (real or imagined) that they're being externally influenced. They don't like their own government making up their minds for them (see also the 2009 election of Ahmedinejad), and they REALLY don't like outsiders doing it.
Change would be great, but it's a place to tread extremely lightly.
I don't disagree, but the other side of the coin is their dedication to supporting terrorist groups who attack us and our allies. Allowing these proxi conflicts and political influences to go unchecked has put where we are today. Our sailors getting snatched up, buzzing our ships, Iranian government throwing us the finger as they attack us covertly and we do nothing about it.
I'm all for stabilizing the middle east, and definitely don't want my son chewing they same sand I did 10 years from now. But damn, some times you have to cut out that cancer so the body can begin to heal. We had that opportunity in 2003, we had a similar opportunity in 2011. Who knows when we will get another one.