Thought Exercise: Would You Rather Fight One Horse-Sized Duck Or 100 Duck-Sized Horses?

[Marauder06]

At a Leader Professional Development session yesterday, the moderator asked each table of ten individuals to discuss, and come to a consensus on, whether you'd rather fight one horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses. No further information was provided. Given the utility and amusement that arose from the discussion, I though it might be fun to do it here as well. (as it turns out this is a pretty common team-building thing but this was the first time I had ever seen it)

So, if you choose to participate, here's how it works: just answer the question. You have to pick one of the two, you can't choose both or neither (e.g. I'd run away). Then you explain your reasoning, in however much detail you want to. Example:

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"I'd fight the horses, because..."
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You can only respond to someone else's post after you've made your own pubic declaration. If you critique someone else's response before posting your own (you can do it all in the same post if you want) I'll kill that post. No critiquing unless you're willing to hold your own opinion up for criticism. As always, keep it civil.

To spice it up, feel free to add a humorous stereotypical military-related response as well, such as:

AC130 pilot: "Duck. Fewer squirters."

SF: <trains insurgent horses to lead an uprising against evil repressive duck overlord>

Marine: "Hold my beer." <gets drunk, strips naked, rides the duck into battle against the horses>

Ranger: "I'll fight all of them. I don't give a f#$k. RLTW!!"

SEAL #1: "You pick; my book contract will be the same amount regardless."
SEAL #2: "I wouldn't fight either, but I'd write a book about it to make everyone think I did, and then I'd start a company called SOFREP."

I'm going to write an article based on the responses and I'll post it here when it's done.

 

[SpitfireV]

If we take into consideration the fact that I appear to have no weapons, I would take the 100 duck sized horses. You can punch and kick those little bastards, whereas trying to avoid a giant duck with that long neck and a huge bill, no thanks. I don't even have a pot big enough to confit the legs and thighs afterwards.

Edit: Also, those little arseholes should get scared of me after I've smashed a few of their mates. They'll run away and I'll use their mates' bodies on the BBQ. Or maybe in the slow cooker. I haven't decided.

 

[Cookie_]

Horses have no real method of attacking other than charging and biting. They can fly, so fighting them would be easier than that time I fought a goose. At that size, they should have super fragile legs, making dispatching them easy.

Also, have you ever seen a duck penis? A horse sized duck would have a fire hose which it would likely beat me with.

 

[Isiah6:8]

I’m going horse sized duck. If it is a fight and I have 100 smart, angry, ankle biting bastards, I don’t know I like that as much as one big duck.

My thought is the horses were shrunk down making them super strong and the duck being blown up might not be able to support its weight on the legs allowing me to dispatch the duck and eat it easier

 

[SpongeBob*24]

Can you imagine the meat a horse sized duck can provide? I picture the Duck I have to fight is the size of a Clydesdale......

Its a no brainer.....its science!

 

[Gunz]

Horses have no real method of attacking other than charging and biting. They can fly, so fighting them would be easier than that time I fought a goose. At that size, they should have super fragile legs, making dispatching them easy.

Also, have you ever seen a duck penis? A horse sized duck would have a fire hose which it would likely beat me with.

You've obviously never been kicked by a horse. Their hoofs are like sledgehammers that strike with the speed of a piston. And their bite is like a steel vice.

100 little horses is a swarm attack. Too many fast, biting, kicking targets to handle all at once.

I will also order the duck.

 

[AWP]

Fuck a duck. Tasty, but that reach, yo...It would beat you like Khabib. The horses...you wouldn't fight 100. You take down enough and the rest will flee in fear.

The art of SEALing the book deal.

Navy/ Marine Hornet driver: still waiting on an operational jet

F-35: Can't bomb either, too busy participating in a photo op telling everyone how great it would be against the duck/ horses. Awaits full IOC in 2035.

UAV crew: Flies mission, takes photos, goes home after 12 hours, files PTSD claim with the VA. Bronze stars for everyone!

Navy Surface Warfare: collides with duck, relieved, retires with full pension.

Shadowspear member: talks shit on the internet, posts meme, tells the horses to use the search feature on how to beat the duck.

 

[SaintKP]

Alright based on the responses saying they would rather fight a 100 duck sized horses, I'm assuming you've never been on a farm or encountered a horse in your life aside from the merry go round when Uncle Chuck took you out for snow cones that one time.

A horse is literally made of muscle, all of it, in its entirety. You know those stories of baby chimps tearing the face off of Susan because she thought they were adorable then said chimp proceeded to do the obvious and get its Ed Gein on. Now imagine a 100, not 99, not 92, not 105. A God damned 100 of these balls of muscle and rage coming at you.

Have you ever been bitten by a horse? It doesn't tickle, it fucking hurts, and imagine your ankles and shins getting bit the fuck up? Yeah it's starting to not sound so hot does it? Oh wait, the horses hooves is considered a lethal weapon in all 50 states including the District of Columbia, and all major territories and minor islands. Seriously your ankles and shins will be broken and turned into a paste from the amount of hits you'd take.

Not to mention the fact that a duck itself isn't exactly small, it's not like a hamster, it's not something you could just drop kick and be done with it.


It's not even a contest, I'd take a duck sized horse any day of the week.

 

[Cookie_]

You've obviously never been kicked by a horse. Their hoofs are like sledgehammers that strike with the speed of a piston. And their bite is like a steel vice.

100 little horses is a swarm attack. Too many fast, biting, kicking targets to handle all at once.

I will also order the duck.

I've been both kicked and bit by horses. I'm thinking that a decrease in size will lead to a decrease in power. If I can get to a location in which they can't all attack me at once, I feel I have a better chance.

 

[ThunderHorse]

The horses...once you kill two you can use them as weapons.

 

[GOTWA]

The horses because, while they are in a herd at that point, they tend to spook easily and will likely not want to fight at all

 

[digrar]

I know I can kill a duck sized horse, and I'm pretty confident I can bowl a few of them over in a pretty short duration. I have serious reservations about being able to take down a horse sized duck with my bare hands and a bit of enthusiasm.

 

[Gunz]

I've been both kicked and bit by horses. I'm thinking that a decrease in size will lead to a decrease in power. If I can get to a location in which they can't all attack me at once, I feel I have a better chance.

I assumed you'd never been kicked because you didn't mention the kick part. I got kicked in the chest by a yearling colt and thought I was gonna die. My wife took me to the ER and we waited and waited. After a couple of hours she asked me if I'd rather stay and wait or go get a steak. So we went and got a steak and a couple of Bloody Mary's.

The horses because, while they are in a heard at that point, they tend to spook easily and will likely not want to fight at all

Good point and true. If you screamed like a banshee and waved your arms like a homicidal maniac they might stampede. Provided they had not been weaponized through bioengineering. If that were the case, the duck might be a better choice.

 

[RackMaster]

This is easy, you take down both.

First, a herd of 100 duck size horses. There'd be 1 big bastard stallion fucking all those mares. So you find the stallion and fuck that little bastard like you're about to win the barrack pig hunting championship on a Friday night. You're then in charge.

So, you take your new haram of horses and surround that duck. Then pluck a fucking duck. Make a new duck down feather bed for your horse haram. A roast that bitch up on a fire.

 

[Isiah6:8]

I'm thinking that a decrease in size will lead to a decrease in power

Depending on how it was decreased. It is the interview q: “If you were shrunk to the size of a nickel and put in a blender, how would you get out?” The answer is just jump out. As you are shrunk your power to mass index amplifies making you some sort literal terminator.

 

[ThunderHorse]

This is easy, you take down both.

First, a herd of 100 duck size horses. There'd be 1 big bastard stallion fucking all those mares. So you find the stallion and fuck that little bastard like you're about to win the barrack pig hunting championship on a Friday night. You're then in charge.

So, you take your new haram of horses and surround that duck. Then pluck a fucking duck. Make a new duck down feather bed for your horse haram. A roast that bitch up on a fire.

I didn't know you Canadians were into beastiality...or are your people from Cymru?

 

[Ooh-Rah]

This thread maybe stranger than the “dot” thread.

 

[Marauder06]

Given only the information provided in the prompt, I'd fight the duck. I'd rather deal with one large, predictable, slow-moving and slow-thinking (I hope!) problem than 100 constantly-changing, unpredictable, little problems. Especially if those little problems were all focused on destroying me.

 

[GOTWA]

Given only the information provided in the prompt, I'd fight the duck. I'd rather deal with one large, predictable, slow-moving and slow-thinking (I hope!) problem than 100 constantly-changing, unpredictable, little problems. Especially if those little problems were all focused on destroying me.

But you only have to worry about a handful at a time or else they get in the way of each other, rendering their attack useless.

 

[Topkick]

100 little horses... because the thought of a giant duck is as scary as hell. I have been attacked by a pissed off regular-sized duck, it's not funny.