Divorce and Retirement

[61J/L]

I should've followed the dictum of - If the army had wanted me to have a spouse, it would've issued me one. But, alas I did not. The ex dragged things on for the sole purpose of making it to 10 years (actually separated much earlier), so he is entitled to part of my pension. I have read about ways to decrease the amount the ex would receive (bc he did the opposite of being supportive as a military spouse), but has anyone here actually had successful experience with this? It's one thing if he was supportive, but to game the system just to leech on the pension I worked for is just ridiculous (put in the most PC terms possible).

 

[RustyShackleford]

Sorry you have to deal with that mess. Look up Dan Jamison’s FersGuide website. He’s a retired FBI agent and a CPA who has been doing gov retirement stuff for years and is very knowledgeable on gov retirements, including pensions and divorce. I know the GS side is different but he may be able to help.

 

[BloodStripe]

Sadly you aren't alone. My old platoon sergeant is currently going through something similar. Apparently there is even a Facebook group of wives at Quantico who are waiting it out just to get as much of that pension as they can.

Best of luck.

 

[61J/L]

Thanks guys, good to know.

RustyShackleford - I'll check out that link. One of my plans is GS based.

BloodStripe - Sounds about right since I wore the pants. I should prob look into some of these skirts groups and see what the other side's strategies are.

 

[Deleted member 2517]

Kill him. Can’t make payments to a corpse.

 

[DA SWO]

Sorry to hear this.
FYI: The 10 year rule was changed to 1 year (Thank you Pres G.W. Bush).

 

[61J/L]

Kill him. Can’t make payments to a corpse.

I can only honestly respond to that offline

 

[61J/L]

Sorry to hear this.
FYI: The 10 year rule was changed to 1 year (Thank you Pres G.W. Bush).

At 10 years, DFAS does the calculations, including COLA, so all the lawyers said it was in my "best interest" that I won't have to be bothered. No one but DFAS knows how to do the calculation now anyway, since it changed in 2018 (in a good way for us). Have to thank the flag officers for that one

 

[Kraut783]

I guess he doesn't have a pension/retirement that you can threaten?

 

[61J/L]

I guess he doesn't have a pension/retirement that you can threaten?

Unfortunately, no. I made more throughout the marriage and worked about 3x as much. Ironically I would've just given him more to go away if he hadn't made me lawyer up. The $$ can only flow in one direction in this situation, and that is out of my pockets. Lesson learned - love is a fickle bitch and in the end marry someone who makes the same amount as you or get a pre-nup

 

[61J/L]

FYI... Just found this online: http://www.ncjfcj.org/sites/default/files/A-5.pdf

Haven't finished reading, but looks like good info and will leave here as a resource.

 

[Kaldak]

Damn. Sorry this is happening to you. Hopefully his lawyers like stepping on their own dicks.

 

[racing_kitty]

I’m sorry this is happening to you. I went through a similar situation when trying to divorce my first husband (he had done his four years before we got married). I managed to get the divorce finalized with a shade less than two years to go, but I damned sure wouldn’t recommend the dirty pool I had to play to get there. I wish you luck.

 

[DA SWO]

FYI... Just found this online: http://www.ncjfcj.org/sites/default/files/A-5.pdf

Haven't finished reading, but looks like good info and will leave here as a resource.

How close to retirement are you?

 

[61J/L]

How close to retirement are you?

With all of the time in training that I have to pay back, my commitment takes me to 2027, which would be 24 yrs creditable towards retirement

 

[61J/L]

Damn. Sorry this is happening to you. Hopefully his lawyers like stepping on their own dicks.

None of them have any. But they are really good at feeding off of dumb people to make more $$$, will give them that

 

[digrar]

Unfortunately, no. I made more throughout the marriage and worked about 3x as much.

Still worth taking half of it off of him if you're going to get yours raided.

 

[RustyShackleford]

RustyShackleford - I'll check out that link. One of my plans is GS based.

Just to be clear, I meant for you to reach out to Dan regarding advice on your retirement/divorce. He’s well versed on the GS side of that and may or may not have some knowledge on the mil side too. As for GS retirement stuff, he’s dialed in.

 

[61J/L]

Still worth taking half of it off of him if you're going to get yours raided.

Unfortunately for me, it wouldn't be half. It would be whatever a judge calls an "equitable distribution" during a trial. Which is like rolling the dice on the entire package. I settled out of court and pushed back on every demand of his as much as I could by hook or by crook

 

[61J/L]

I’m sorry this is happening to you. I went through a similar situation when trying to divorce my first husband (he had done his four years before we got married). I managed to get the divorce finalized with a shade less than two years to go, but I damned sure wouldn’t recommend the dirty pool I had to play to get there. I wish you luck.

You know, Karma is a bitch... sometimes she comes in the form of a runaway bus who runs down an unwary pedestrian... who knows what could happen before the clock runs out and it's time to collect retirement pay