Call me crazy - but hear me out...
Once upon a time...
...I agreed to drive a buddy to the recruiting office - and get this - so we could go do some underage drinking when he was done talking to the recruiter !!!
Me: Going to see an Army recruiter? Are you serious? You fucking loser. Just don't be all day - we need to hit the Korean grocery store before rush hour or they wont sell us beer...
We got there and the recruiter looked like a bad ass. This dude was every bit of 6'2 and jacked.
It was the mid 80's and I was just an 18 year old punk kid with a dirty shop uniform, an earring, and a haircut that looked like I was a roadie for Motley Crue. I was an angry (I know, right) troubled teenager that was going nowhere and the recruiter just gave me a look of pity and went about his business like I didn't exist.
My buddy was (still is) a good dude - clean cut - smart - polite - and was determined to join the Army.
The recruiter was an E5 - not that it mattered or that I even knew the difference - but he had a picture of him and President Reagan hung near his desk - as well as a picture of him taken while he was walking a post as a Tomb Guard - and this fucking guy was looking down his nose at me.
I was both intimidated and inspired by this guy.
His desk was pretty much in the open and while I paced back and forth looking at stuff on the walls, I could hear them talk. He made a few comments to my buddy that I overheard that really got under my skin.
He talked about motivation - respect - hard work - commitment - responsibility - standards - and while he was clearly "pitching" my buddy - the attitude that I brought into the building made me feel like he was talking shit about me and all of the traits that I did NOT possess. It was like he was saying that he could tell from the way I looked that I didn't have what it took to serve in his Army.
To be VERY specific - he never made a pitch at me - he didn't offer me a pamphlet - nothing.
I was invisible to this guy.
When we left - he said goodbye to Steve - to me, not a word.
...well, FUCK that guy.
Fast forward a few months. My buddy is in AIT, getting ready to go to Airborne School and I am just hanging out - working a job that paid for hot rod parts and weekend partying and not much more.
I just couldn't stop thinking about that fucking meat head and his stupid blue suit and his stupid condescending face and that bullshit he was saying about motivation, hard work, respect, and commitment and how convinced I was that his bullshit recruiting pitch was as much for my buddy as it was to talk shit to me...
I got a haircut (which shocked the shit out of my parents)
I went back to SGT Kirby's office to talk to him - and somehow, he remembered that I was the guy that came in with 'Steven' a while back.
I took the ASVAB - did well - and before I knew it - this guy wasn't actually the meat headed prick in a stupid uniform that I thought he was. He was trying to help me become someone better.
He talked to me about the same shit he talked to Steve about - but this time it felt more like a friendly challenge than an attack. He talked about Airborne School and his first jump and what blood wings were and I wanted some of that shit.
Blood wings?
Holy Shit that sounds fucking epic!
I was sold.
I wanted to earn me some blood wings just like this fucking guy.
I didn't join the Army because of some ham fisted slogan.
I didn't join the Army because some chuckle head promised to write me a check for some free college.
I didn't join because some cheesy TV commercial "validated my identity"
I didn't join to make hip hop videos and EweToob content
I didn't join to play on the Army video Game Team
I didn't join the Army because of some lame fucking recruiting campaign served up by some board room marketing executive...
I joined because of one Soldiers presence.
I joined because I was exposed to a Soldier that embodied what I expected a soldier to look like.
I joined because I was challenged to be better.
We will continue to lower standards and throw precious tax payer dollars into the shitter until our nations senior leaders figure out that no amount of bullshit will fool someone when you are asking them to take a job that endangers their life.
The military has to inspire its recruits - otherwise it is just hiring employees like every other business.
A military cannot pander to its recruits if it is looking to recruit warriors.
Until our legion of celebrity generals and their career-ladder-climbing civilian counterparts realize that - we are doomed...
As a side note - the picture of then Corporal Kirby with President Reagan was taken while he was a Sentinel at the Tomb of the Unknown soldier. He was posted next to the guard shack when some nut stepped over the chain and walked out into the restricted area. CPL Kirby went to port arms with his M14 and issued the challenge that many people have seen them do when someone gets froggy and crosses that chain...
...this nut however, pulled out a pistol at pointed it at him. Unfazed, Kirby remained at port arms in front of this jackass and stood his ground - straight up gangster. As this dip shit stood there not sure what to do next - considering that he was now faced with a dude that stood over 6 feet tall, built like a fucking linebacker holding a ten pound piece of wood and steel with a 7 inch long bayonet blade sticking off the end of the barrel.
THAT is who we need Recruiting the next generation of American soldiers - someone that will stand at port arms with an unloaded rifle while refusing to let some asshole with a loaded pistol take one more mother fucking step forward.
Intersectionality isn't going to get it done.
Rant Mode Deactivated
