:SPOILERS: House of the Dragon

The BLUF here, and not even my quote? "How can a show about dragons and incest still be so dull?"

The sad thing is, this show has so much potential but the overall writing and the pace are horrible. I cannot fathom why they are spending so much time on her reluctance to wed. If they are doing this to justify the incest angle, they are missing the mark. The actress is competent enough in her role, but every single episode has the same conversation, sometimes twice. That isn’t her fault, that’s bad writing.

Some of the GoT associations are great and some miss the mark; they feel forced upon us like a king summoning the queen to his chambers at a late hour.

I have to wonder if they overreached on the timeline. They went back a bit too far unless they do some things later this season, but the writing is killing that dream. There are something like 12 or 13 more Targaryen rulers before Jamie Lannister gets his regicide on, plus countless more before this mess we're watching, and this is the best option?

HBO's decision to kill off other prequels means this is it unless they greenlight future projects. THIS. IS. IT. Buh-dee, buh-dee, buh-dee, that's all folks! I even looked for other prequels by using the old Google, searching game of thrones prequel and one of the top hits?

Game of groans: why is House of the Dragon so dull?

Despite its leaning heavily on the world-building of its predecessor, and having all the best resources – the close involvement of George RR Martin; the direction of Miguel Sapochnik, who brought us the very excellent Battle of the Bastards; and an unprecedented budget – I have to wonder, how can a show about dragons and incest still be so dull?

Westeros, you deserve better.
 
The BLUF here, and not even my quote? "How can a show about dragons and incest still be so dull?"

That is pretty much what made GOT the GOAT! :ROFLMAO:

The writers just decided to layer it with a really good story. Actually they layered it with SEVEN really good stories all happening at once, all tying together with huge bombs being dropped every episode.

Here we have no bombs, lame stories and dragons....speaking of which what was the point of the Near miss dragon/Princess ship scene? Was he having a IFE? That kind of stuff makes you hope something big is about to happen and then disappointment is all we are served!

:(
 
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Episode 5: It smell like bitch in here.

This will shock everyone, but we were reminded on multiple occasions, AGAIN, that Princess No Jaw doesn't want to wed anyone but the man of her choice. Fuck off, show. Anyway, some really good stuff happened this week. I know you're supposed to start with bad and end with good, but I don't learn so gooder. I'd call it some type of mind game, but I don't have my own cool hat, so whatevs.

This episode wasn't a banger, but it was maybe the best so far which says a lot considering a few episodes ago we had dragon CAS. They're probably tied, but for different reasons. The feast "scene" because there were so many wonderful bits in there, was very, very good. I thought the writing was solid, the tension it created was great, and all of the little pieces put into motion or covered were fantastic. Plus, it is a Westerosi wedding, so what could possibly go wrong? Outside of the battles, this scene/ episode is why you tune into GoT. You know something's going down, but what is anyone's guess...and we got some of that. Daemon gonna' Daemon too which is always a good time, especially his divorce.

But then...

The King's trip north wasn't bad. It set up the episode and some of the series really. It showed us that the king's health isn't the best, how his reign is a bit weakened (in part because what's her missing face won't wed, let's be honest), and the nice twist with his son/ her husband to be. Yet, it gave us Ser Bitchface's little emotional meltdown on the ship. Yeah, yeah, that set up some later stuff, so I get it, but it was awkward. We also had discount Varys/ Littlefinger with his cane. I'm starting to think the smartest people in Westeros are all crippled or mangled in some form. The Westeros Mensa chapters must look like a convention for "people of determination" here in the US.

What's his nuts, the guy marrying Princess Raygun, is gay. Cool, no biggie, but his boyfriend? What a jealous little bitch. STFU, stay in the shadows, and there are no problems. The future king consort told him him to be chill, life is good. Life...was not good or long.

Alicent's flex on the king reminded us that he sucks, but that matter was "put to rest" by the end of the episode. Handless Otto's good bye to Alicent.... Dude, you fucking pimped out your 15YO daughter, then you want to lecture her (for the third or fourth time) about the future of her son, and then give her a tearful goodbye? Fuck off, Otto.

The new Hand? Groan.

The Small Council? Still a bunch of overweight girls playing dress-up in men's clothing. I expect their meetings to end when one starts braiding another's hair...

How do the writers kill it with the feast, but whiff on the rest?

3.5 out of 5 herbal poultices
 
Agree on the above review. I think this was the best episode yet in regards to GoT tradition.

When stuff got crazy at the Feast...you really didn't know what was going down. I thought maybe Daemon kidnapped the Princess.....but then you see Sir Christian going full retard. The WALL really isn't mentioned much so I guess he was like my secret is out I'm going down.

I thought Daemons wife was hot...maybe I'm just old school. Not sure what that was on the King's arm....I failed medical school...but it doesn't look good.

Bottom line if you took Dragon CAS part from the crabby boys episode and mixxxed it with the Feast you would have a GoT (S1-6) worthy episode. I'm hopeful the trend will continue and this wasn't just a one off accident....

:ROFLMAO:
 
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Where do I begin?

I guess the plus is we don't have to hear Princess Rosanna whine about not selecting her husband. This could shape up to be the best episode yet.

But then House of the Dragon happened.

I think this episode the writers decided to have a competition: how weak can we make our characters? Errybody looking weak except maybe Alicent and even she is suspect. Discount Mother of Dragons went from being strong-willed and politically savvy to living in denial and making painfully obvious decisions like having multiple children who look nothing like their supposed parents. It took an entire episode, a fist fight, and whatever else I've forgotten before she realized "hey, people know I'm fucking a guard."

Daemon and the fam are staying at a Holiday Inn Express where he's taken up reading. The king just sucks. Hand 2.0 still acts like he is new on the job (plus how many kids does he have working there, but Otto was fired?). The kids of Buy One, Get One Daenarys are twats. The Queen's kids are twats. The only character one could like in this episode, and maybe the one woman is this show to look like she's thriving in the evil patriarchy, took "post" partum depression to a scorching new high.

Oh! Our throwback to the original series? We watch a teenager masturbate in the same window Tommen used for his BASE jump. "Titties = bad" because empowerment, but a teen beating off is okay? Yep, way to break the notion that Hollywood is filled with pedophiles.

I hope the writers die from hemorrhagic dick cancer of the mouth.

Along the way we had some cool dragon flying scenes. Great Value Littlefinger decides to murder his family using some dudes his bitch-ass had mutilated. I think I've had my fill of watching childbirth. The king is still alive because...plot? The queen's confidant is the ex-bitch...boyfriend, I meant boyfriend, of Princess Retarda. Even the political intrigue is more obvious than a red star cluster on a moonless night.

2.5 out of 5 dragonpigs
 
Before I drop My episode recap....Let's review the winning recipe from GoT:
Tons of Great stories, alot of attractive people, all the deaths.


Here we find ourselves in Episode 6 or so, we time traveled 10 years, and everyone is uglier.
The kings sons are ugly.
Princess kids look like the hound jr.
Daemons wifey goes out like a rider.. but how did baby die?
WE have multiple hand encounters and I'm pretty sure 8th grade drama class can deliver better lines.
The queen and new little finger are just winging stuff
Its harder to follow the point of the small council
2 minutes of dragon scene...no complaints....need more cowbell
Where do the eggs keep coming from?

So it appears the HOTD recipe is:
1 really bad story, ugly people, no death. It is getting harder to stomach!

O_o

Trying to remember, but doesn't Daemon end up marrying Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen anyway? In family marriage one of the issues that caused the mad king?


That's how I remember it going down! I don't think the mad king comes from them though. I needs to do some research.

:thumbsup:
 
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"Daemons wifey goes out like a rider.. but how did baby die?" Baby was still inside her, knowing the birth would kill both of them...she went out in a blaze.
 
Before I drop My episode recap....Let's review the winning recipe from GoT:
Tons of Great stories, alot of attractive people, all the deaths.


Here we find ourselves in Episode 6 or so, we time traveled 10 years, and everyone is uglier.
The kings sons are ugly.
Princess kids look like the hound jr.
Daemons wifey goes out like a rider.. but how did baby die?
WE have multiple hand encounters and I'm pretty sure 8th grade drama class can deliver better lines.
The queen and new little finger are just winging stuff
Its harder to follow the point of the small council
2 minutes of dragon scene...no complaints....need more cowbell
Where do the eggs keep coming from?

So it appears the HOTD recipe is:
1 really bad story, ugly people, no death. It is getting harder to stomach!

O_o



That's how I remember it going down! I don't think the mad king comes from them though. I needs to do some research.

:thumbsup:

Yeah, your right...bit more times has to pass.

1664578637049.png
 
"Daemons wifey goes out like a rider.. but how did baby die?" Baby was still inside her, knowing the birth would kill both of them...she went out in a blaze.

Daemon rode thru the fire so i thought maybe he could withstand the fire and his baby too. I was wanting something to go right this episode....let me have this. :ROFLMAO:
 
Not caught up, through EP 5...Knight of Kisses got fucked. Alicent calls her banners like a trollop, she got what she wanted. Rhaenyra married off so her husband would be happy. Cries a lot doesn't want to be the father of her Children? But we get robbed of him committing sepuku? When it comes to the TV show killing off people, that wouldn't have been helpful but wouldn't help the the next part of the story line 15 years from now where he tears up the kings will and gets half the realm burned. (way to much ASOIAF wiki)

One thing about this whole show that I've found different is how vulgar it gets. We had tournaments and shit in GoT. But dudes just being murdered wholesale...like she complained about tourney knights but like those melees were real. Whereas in the books, men survived. Guess there was a lot more yielding. Then the 10 year old wants her hand, some twerp insults him because he's a kid...well fuck off dude you're about to be run through because that kid don't take no insults. Then that's gets back to the dude murdering someone at the King's feast...he should have been killed as an offering to the gods...but gotta keep the story line where he becomes a green and wants to munch the widowed queen's snatch to become her son's adopted dad err hand.
 
FINALLY! Finally we have a decent (mostly) episode. Praise the old gods and the new!

We have a funeral for Daemon's ex. Slow, but at least the scene has some tension. Sideways glances, hushed convos with darting eyes, slow...but it sets up the episode. One of the many surly albino kids rides a dragon, claiming it for his own. Of course the issue of Princess Rayban's issue is brought up leading to a decent little kid fight which REALLY sets things in to motion. Albino dragon rider has a wicked scar where his left eye used to be and Queen Alicunt wants justice for the loss of his eye. Eventually the root cause of the fight is discussed with the king finally telling the assembled that to question the legitimacy of Princess Roadkill's children is treason.

Queen Fiddycent goes after Princess Racewar, slashing her with that special HOT-related dagger we've forgotten about. Somewhere in all of this the Princess and Daemon gave us some true incest. Daemon sets up her husband/ future King Consort to be murdered, and then the Princess and Daemon tie the knot in a weird-ass ceremony.

BUUUUTTTTTTT, plot twist time! The husband and his would-be assassin (his boyfriend) merc out some poor kid and then burn off his face. "No face, no case" and the Bend Over Boy then hop into a rowboat...roll credits.

- The King under transport is the picture of death. On land he is reasonably well. WTF?
- The Queen and Off-brand Littlefinger continue to bro out, but she's starting to see him as a liability.
- Dollar Tree Queen of Thorns is wearing thin. Yes, you aren't the queen. Yes, you're smarter than everyone. Yes, you can shut the fuck up and move on.
- Otto back as the hand? Um, did ya' forget why he was fired, writers? BY YOU?!

4 out of 5 walks on the beach
 
Finally caught up. Alot to unpack in the last 2 episodes.

Tired of the new old hand, small council, queen who overplays her hand, crippled little finger, newer sea snake, king who looks 500 years old in 6 years. wtf , and all the other lack of stories.

Edit...best part Daemon takes the head right off.

Do we have 8 or 10 episodes this season.......?

8-)
 
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